OK -- I have quickly read through the thread.
You people need to get a grip and stop the personal attacks.
I happen to know Hildy in person and I saw first hand the loving care she gave to her bed ridden mom.
While my grandmother wasn't bedridden, I took care of her for over ten years as she had dementia. I included her in a lot of activities and chores around the house. There just wasn't a whole lot she could do without risking her life and mine.
A few months ago, it reached a point where it was getting virtually impossible and my whole life was put on hold because I was basically caring for my grandmother who had trouble putting her own clothes on properly or turning on the faucet for the bath tub. So my father (her son), my mother and I moved my grandmother into a nursing home facility.
If that isn't enough, THEY are having a helluva time trying to keep her from wandering outside the building, getting her into bed at night at a decent hour (she harasses other residents until 1:00 or 2:00 in the morning).
Now my aunt (dad's older sister) is threatening to have dad turn off the water, and the utilities in my grandmother's house that she has promised is mine when my grandmother passes on, because my aunt has NO compassion for me, my father, or her OWN MOTHER. She's worried about the inheritance money.
I've pretty much stayed out of the fight as I have very little to say regarding the matter, but silly family disagreements like this is enough to set anyone off.
I've seen it all first hand. I don't need to be lectured by holier-than-thou types about what's right and what's wrong.
Not once, have I, my father, or my mother made money an issue in this.