Sorry, but I don't think it's that obvious. Otherwise we would not have a pretty intelligent former Secretary of State saying "we're not at war".
Your examples prove my point. Surely you are not saying we are at war with Iraq? After all they are now in the process of seating the first democratically elected coalition government that our troops fought to install (er, facilitate). So at most we are at war with "some terrorist elements in Iraq" - but not with Iraq.
Perhaps they are in cahoots with Iran, perhaps they are not. It is by no means clear. No doubt they all hate us, but still lots of countries (with real armies and tanks and things) hated us throughout the cold war and we didn't go to war with them.
The British fought the IRA for twenty years. But, to my way of thinking it never rose to a war. That's how I view the USA vs. Fascist Ismlamists contest we are in today.