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To: HitmanNY
You are right. I have nothing against attractive women, wink. But I guess what I am miffed about is the way he has always preached against putting children first, and now here he is, taking all these calls, blessing the people who think divorce is good for kids. It isn't. If he didn't have kids, he could divorce and remarry all day.

Living by your values doesn't mean living by your lust. I just hope they tried everything to save the marriage first, and it wasn't HIM CHEATING that broke them up. I'm sorry, but he is known around here as a moral example, and I would be disappointed if he didn't at least behave like a mensch. But I do not know the story. I could be way off base.

45 posted on 12/30/2005 11:43:33 AM PST by Yaelle
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To: Yaelle
Again, things are seldom as simple and straightforward as one spouse cheating and the other spouse being a shocked, innocent victim cold-cocked by reality.

A cheater is easy to deride - they break one of the big promises they made in their lives. That being said, the simple fact that someone was alienated by their spouse and took up with someone else doesn't necessarily mean that the cheated-upon spouse is entirely innocent, or even deserving of undue sympathy.

Very few people set out to cheat on their spouses. Almost every person who tells a jealous spouse to 'trust me,' is more likely than not sincere - when they say those words. The decision is seldom to cheat on their spouse, but much more often to indulge in their lust for someone else. It's a bad thing, I agree. It's not a 'good guy-bad guy' thing where the cheater is automatically the bad guy, I am afraid.

This is a minefield because a lot of people can't cope with the fact that someone can rightfully reject their current spouse because of deficiencies in their character, and yet execute that rejection in a very bad way by indulging in extramartial relationship with someone else.

I have always suspected that there is almost no clarity on this issue because people can't cope with the fact that they aren't being a good spouse themselves, and can't cope with the idea of being (rightfully) rejected themselves. Just my gut feeling on the matter.

I think divorce is bad for kids, but I never thought it was bad for marriage. I think Dennis has taken a similar posture over the years.

I admit, I am in nyc and not listening to his show today. I'll be sure to catch it next week, though.
55 posted on 12/30/2005 11:53:17 AM PST by HitmanLV (Listen to my demos for Savage Nation contest: http://www.geocities.com/mr_vinnie_vegas/index.html)
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