Thanks. The important component as you said is not to hold something against the other person in a bad spell. That is amazingly difficult, I think.
It's best to have aligned life goals rather than make big surrenders like the one I mentioned. If the woman gives in, at some level (unless motherhood really suits her), and she really never wanted kids, there will be some resentment there against hubby. similarly, hubby who gives in with no kids (but who wanted them) will feel pangs on resentment as his siblings and friends enjoy their children, and may grow to resent his surrender on the issue.
These things have a habit of getting worse.
For me, I tend to value practical responses that are principled over principled responses that are impractical. :-) Some mature compromises and indeed sacrifices must be made to keep a marriage intact. The bigger and more important those surrenders/compromises are, the more potentially harmful they may grow to be.
Just the truth. Thanks! I come to this as a practicing, but practical, Catholic, by the way.
: ). Practical Protestant in my perspectives. Mostly, I try to really understand what God expects from us.
Perfection is certainly not one of those things. Thank goodness, because honestly I could never live up to half the "important principles" people spout around here. All I can say is that I am unflinchingly grateful that I have a God that was willing to take the wages of sin for me.