They are bitter and what comes out is anger and resentment - no matter what makes sense for a person that is well. I would bet money these folks were bitter before the hurricane because they are way too good at it.
During the evacuation when the refugees first arrived in Houston, we read about volunteers being belittled by individuals. It makes you wonder if love and kindness is a total stranger to some people. That is sad. This is what our welfare system produces - broken, bitter individuals. This is not true of all - but it is true for many.
Right. My grandparents were poor. Their home was always spotless.
If you're going to help, you have to get it straight in your mind from the start that you don't expect thanks. Or you're going to be sorely disappointed, when working with the poor, or anybody for that matter.