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It's not a sure death sentence. Most of the time, you just get sick, sometimes quite sick. If your first reaction killed you, then yes, you would not learn from it.

How sick you get, and to what level, depends on lots of factors.

So one day you eat a candybar, and your mouth gets itchy and you get a few hives. You may or may not think that's alarming.

Another time, your face swells up, and so does your tongue, and you go to ER for shots and monitoring. This may have gone away on its own, but now an MD tells you you (or your 2 yr old) that you are PA- peanut allergic.

The reaction is not always swelling. Your blood pressure can drop drastically enough to kill you(that's the shock in anaphylactic shock).

PA people can have several reactions per year until they learn how to avoid peanuts. It's a percentage thing- one of those reactions someday is gonna get you if you don't learn to make the changes in your life (or teach your PA kid) that will keep you safer.

Actually, once you have a reaction, every subsequent reaction will get worse. Also teaching avoidance behavoirs helps, but the last data I saw said that 75% of adults making a good effort to avoid peanuts still had a reaction over a 5 yr span. THe problem is you can't avoid the behavior of others.
The restaurant worker who cuts your sandwich with a knife used on something with peanuts in it. The spoon set on the counter next to the peanut butter, etc. Or like my son, the food fight where you get hit with something with peanuts in it. The bottom line is if you have a peanut allergy you need to be vigilant and ready 24/7. This is very difficult to teach teenagers, believe me. I do agree most deaths are people who either do not have their epinephrine with them, or who do not use it in a timely matter. But you can never let your guard down
And yes, there is the rare case where you do everything right and still have a fatal outcome. I expect my son to live a normal lifespan, but I spend a lot of time on my knees over this one, because ultimately only God can keep him safe.