Who sets this scale? Awhile back it was 15%. 10% used to be acceptable. It wouldn't surprise me if this is coming from the left. If your service is good most will tip accordingly but why should they feel obligated for 20%?
I generally get it.
Since I'm in the business, and most of my meals at top-end establishments are comp-ed, I make sure that I find out what the total would have been, and tip accordingly. I've gone out with a friend for a 'free' dinner that included paired wines for each course, and would have cost $300 had it not been a comp. I tipped out at 25% that night.
/john
It's the cost of doing business - it depends a lot on the caliber of the restaurant of course, but if you can't afford 20% you may do better to stay home. Maybe I'm spoiled after over three decades of work experience in high-end dining atmospheres; just remember the rules of supply and demand.
There is always someone willing to tip 30% for the same experience. The valet, maitre' d, sommelier (as in my case) are often part of the formula.
Do I have some stories...
Like most of us, I've had ups and downs in life and am very grateful for what success I have now. Even during the hard times I maintained faith in myself, tried to treat everyone fairly, and when I could afford to eat out somewhere I always tipped well. I found that many times, when I needed it most,people "unexpectedly" helped me along the way. Its a Karma thing.
I am by no means rich, but unless the service is poor I always tip 20%. It may seem excessively generous to you but I consider it my way of giving back. Most people waiting tables really need the money.
Also, I like to go places where people remember my name and treat me kindly because they know I appreciate them and actually give a give a damn about their well being.
Im guessing you have never worked in a service industry or have not heard that the cost of living does increase over time. I have been in this industry for seven years and currently as of january our base pay is a little over 3 dollars. Once I have tipped out 4 percent of my sales I make an average of 8 dollars an hour on a good week. Try paying for college, children, and a mortgage on that income. If you don't tip I don't get paid so please start having a little compassion for those hard, struggling workers.