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First a few quotes from this thread - Since I have backed into this subject before on FR, and had to deal with serious hysterical incoming, let me make clear what I'm saying and what I'm not saying.

Having children out of wedlock is a very bad thing.

If you have a child out of wedlock, by choice, and choose to remain out of wedlock, you're a selfish, irresponsible child yourself, I don't care if you're the mother or the father (or both, I guess, in the new order that seems to be coming our way).

This subject is NOT about abortion.

Until the Government stops paying for most of these bastards nothing will change.

And so are we all, since we have to deal with those children and the adults they become.

So when you look around and think to yourself, "Wow, there are a lot of bastards out there," you're not just imagining it. It's true.

Are we turning into a nation of b@$#@%*$?

Looks like we're going to need to build more jails.

A better title may be: "More Sluts in US than Ever Before". The women in those situations got what they deserve.

They just had the misfortune of being born to an irresponsible parent.

What the heck are their reference points?

Now we have a nation of bastards.

Another problem that people often ignore is how much danger the daughters are in from mom's revolving door boyfriends.

While single parents deserve our help through acts of kindness and charity as needed, it is not the best situation and we should never pretend that it is.

I like older women, but I prefer them to be independent and Something ladies should think about should they decide to pop one out: you aren't as attractive to the men out there unless you are a total slut, and IN THAT CASE, you will only get the bottom of the barrel.

wow, what a spectrum of opinions. No one wants to be called judgmental, yet look above and what is written. Although the posters will allow that not all single moms are sluts or trying to advance a liberal agenda - it sure seems like fun to assume that and make the comments with that ASSumption.

So here's a perspective without hysteria for ya - I'm a single mom. I was 34 when I got pregnant - it was not a serious relationship, - It was however after a marriage dissolved. I was wrong to be intimately involved. And - so was the dad - he isn't paying child support, has nothing to do with his daughter. And quite frankly, since all he's done is lie for the last few years, it's not a relationship I would chose to foster for her.

Now - in the ideal world this wouldn't have happened. But I live in the real world, I made a decision in a heartbeat that I carry the consequence and the stigma (and don't think for an instant, there is not still stigma about being a single mom). My world involves a small business that means I am able work from home ( alot of hours) and take care of my own daughter. I don't get assistance from the state (and did I mention I don't get assistance from the dad? - I don't recall seeing any cracks on the dad's that disappear, just cracks on the moms that have kids. When Christian men "mess up" King David is brought up as an example of God using broken vessels, when women get pregnant - we're sluts and whores).

I'm a Christian, I grew up in a Christian home, went to Christian schools and universities, had the same two married to each other parents until my wonderful dad passed away in January. I didn't step away from my faith - I did however, step away from what I knew to be right.

What point of reference do I have for my daughter? - well there are aunts and uncles that have been married for 20 years now - there are church friends, and other friends. They get pointed out. We have the Bible to use as a reference. And somehow, by the Lord's graciousness, I get past my bitterness, and help her grow up wanting a family, a GODLY husband - and all the blessings that can entail. And I tell her stories, and we're around my extended family - she knows it's not just the two of us. We're in a lot better position then a lot of folks are. (Not that there isn't a lot of juggling that goes on, but that's for me to carry - not her.)

I made an irresponsible choice. I am not an irresponsible person - that would have been the easy way out - and like it or not John Robinson - that does include abortion. I am not a selfish person - except with my time. I'm the one who looks at my beautiful blessing all day every day, and thanks God for such a wonderful opportunity. How in the world did He trust me with this daughter of mine?

I understand there is an agenda among some to leave father's out entirely. As someone who had the best dad one could ask for (in spite of how much I exasperated him over the years) it pains me to think that people want to deliberately leave that out. It hurts deeply that my daughter will never know what it's like to be a daddy's girl (or a grandpa's girl for that matter.) And I'm still not sure who's going to teach her to not throw like a girl. I can teach her to root for the Raider's (even in the tough years) though.

What's to stop her from repeating my mistake? Hopefully she'll see the consequences first hand, and will avoid it - if not - she always has a home to come back to with no stones - owning up to responsibility - sure, but no stones.

Hopefully she gets a tough shell early on by well meaning, but hateful comments from people in the real world much like people on this forum who think she can't possibly have a shot, because she's only got a- selfish- irresponsible mother.

Come on, words - even typed - hit people you don't expect them to. Opinions are like - well we all have one - but we can still have opinions with out being harsh and mean just because we can.