I'm in the same boat. My sister and I haven't lived anywhere near each other in over fifteen years.
I wish I had a close relationship with her, but when we're together, we have a huge fight two days after we see each other. It's like clockwork.
I love her, but I guess there are too many "issues," relating to our parents, that we'll never be able to get past.
I can't really blame my parents, (I've never seen them figh, only civil arguement) except that if there was a fight, we never talked it out.
My siblings all treat me like the black sheep. I guess it's because I went military out of highschool, then worked blue collar several years before going to college. Now, I only have a bachelors degree, when all have there masters, and one is a PhD with his JD. I have not had much published, either.
The fact I drink (quit a month ago) smoke cigarettes and have a heavy-duty temper are also contributing factors.
When we get together, it's always in hotels or disney so we can escape when necessary.