Replies

"Twelve years old is way too old to get a spanking with pants dropped--especially for typical goofiness and irresponsibility. A twelve year-old boy is very apt to forget things, fall asleep in class, be flaky and ditzy and confused while his body is going on a hormonal rampage of growth and change. At that age a parent should be in a more managing role than a disciplinarian role."

No, twelve is not way too old for a bare butt strapping. And its because of the very things you list about a boy that age. He needs things very basic and remedial so it won't be so easily forgotten. The boy needs to fear physical punishment. Between the ages of twelve and fifteen is the worse possible time to spare the rod.

Its a lovely thought, but to reason with kids is nothing more than trying to elevating them to your level as an adult. It sounds good in theory, but they are not equipped to handle it. A swift physical punishment get the attention and is not soon forgot. And it usually takes only one time to correct a situation. Repeated groundings and denials of privilege is for those parents that don't take raising their kids seriously and kinda just hopes everything turns out ok.

Thank you for saying what I wanted to say. I shy away from starting an argument, but you are right that boys at that age are the very ones who need the capital punishment the most. The Marine Corps is a prime example of what strict discipline can do for a young man. The lack of discipline is what is wrong with the young males in our society. We've allowed a couple of generations of males to go "uncivilized" and we are reaping the results.

Every child is different, and I can agree that willful wrongdoing could merit a good ass-whupping and 12 years old isn't above that threshhold. However, I grew up in a totalitarian, disciplinarian household where my brother (admittedly willful) was beaten and whupped right up the age of 16 but given no place for his own spirit to claim responsibility and grow. The short term effects were a short-lived sense of order, the long-term effects were a provocation to wrath and fury.

There is a point where boys are expected to grow into reasonable men. Twelve years old is not four years old. It's time to respect their intelligence and teach them how to be men of self-restraint who don't need their butts whupped. Twelve years old is plenty old enough for a boy to learn the expectations involved in becoming a man...and men don't need spankings.

We have lowered the expectations of boys to the point of madness. Young men need direction and training for their future, but they'd be better off learning self-discipline from within instead of consequences from without. I've noticed that the school of hard knocks is full of hard heads.