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MORFORD: 14 Thoughts For The New Pope - Condoms. Female priests. Stop gay bashing. And dammit,...
San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 4/20/5 | Mark Morford

Posted on 04/20/2005 8:10:16 AM PDT by SmithL

OK, first things first.

They say you're a hard-line conservative, new pope Joseph Ratzinger (a.k.a. Benedict XVI) of Germany. Very old school and drab, a real lover of repressive, bitter, orthodox doctrine. No fun at parties. Catholic in chains. What glorious times of joy and progress the church is in for, millions now say, dejected sarcasm dripping from their once-hopeful mouths.

See, most spiritually progressive peoples the world over were sort of hoping for a new pope who would recognize this as a historic opportunity,

(Excerpt) Read more at sfgate.com ...


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Culture/Society; News/Current Events
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MORFORDITE ALERT!
You've been warned.
1 posted on 04/20/2005 8:10:22 AM PDT by SmithL
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To: SmithL
I guess they can go and find a religion that suits their purposes....Martin Luther did...Henry VIII did....why not them................. (No....absolutely not....Lex Luthor did not post his 95 theses on the door of Superman's 'Fortress of Solitude')
2 posted on 04/20/2005 8:14:48 AM PDT by Vaquero ("an armed society is a polite society "( Robert Heinlien).)
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To: SmithL

I never understood sentiments like this. If one doesn't like the teachings of the Catholic Church, one should find a church more suited to one's inclinations. A faith is not duty-bound to cater to its adherents. From the sound of this guy, he should look into the Unitarian Church.


3 posted on 04/20/2005 8:15:01 AM PDT by Cyclopean Squid (History remembers only what was, not what might have been.)
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To: SmithL

If the author doesn't like Catholic philosophy, he doesn't have to be one. He could even form his own church, I suppose. That should solve his problem.

It's interesting to me how so many on the left apparently obsess upon a religion that they claim to detest so much. Kind of like a rebellious kid saying they hate their parents yet doing anything to get a rise (attention) out of them.

But don't ever say the left opposes people of faith - that's a big no-no!


4 posted on 04/20/2005 8:15:28 AM PDT by cvq3842
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To: SmithL

This is an historic opportunity. This is the point where the Pope says "We should follow the existing rules, not change the rules to follow what we want to do".


5 posted on 04/20/2005 8:17:34 AM PDT by Personal Responsibility (Those who have sacked the sackers who were sacked for stealing my signature have been sacked.)
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To: SmithL; xsmommy; cyborg; onyx

Is that sulphur I smell? I rarely pay him any mind, and I'm a little sorry I did.


6 posted on 04/20/2005 8:17:37 AM PDT by fortunecookie
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To: SmithL

Morford nailing his feces ...er, uh, theses on the door of the Catholic church.


7 posted on 04/20/2005 8:17:42 AM PDT by KarlInOhio (Blackwell for Governor 2006: hated by the 'Rats, feared by the RINOs.)
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To: SmithL

Now imagine him saying this about, oh, say Jessie Jackson. He'd be out on his butt on Market Street in less than five minutes.


8 posted on 04/20/2005 8:17:47 AM PDT by HolgerDansk ("Oh Bother", said Pooh, as he chambered another round.)
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To: SmithL

Hey, Mr. Morford, if people don't like the doctrines of the Roman Catholic Church, they should leave it! Because progressives want a church that isn't Catholic.


9 posted on 04/20/2005 8:18:06 AM PDT by RexBeach ("I can see it now. You and the moon. You wear a necktie so I'll know you." -Groucho Marx)
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To: SmithL

Hahahaha, I love it! Liberal meltdown has commenced :)


10 posted on 04/20/2005 8:18:39 AM PDT by TheSpottedOwl (Free Mexico!)
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To: Vaquero

There is a defacto Church of San Francisco. Gavin "Any Twosome" Newsome is their High Priest, and the Morfordite is their Gospel-writer.


11 posted on 04/20/2005 8:19:28 AM PDT by SmithL (Proud Submariner)
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To: SmithL

Don't you just know old St. Peter is going to have a copy of this little gem laying around when Mordo finally croaks and finds himself knocking on Heaven's door?


12 posted on 04/20/2005 8:20:10 AM PDT by Thrusher (Remember the Mog.)
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To: SmithL

Just why do Morford and his fellow perverts care one way or another who the Pope is? They will denigrate and deride the Church at every opportunity, yet still seek its approval. It's an interesting paradox


13 posted on 04/20/2005 8:20:40 AM PDT by Rummyfan
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To: Personal Responsibility

Yes, if public opinion mandated religious direction, we'd have a religion of the lowest common denominator. Sounds like this author really needs a social club, not a religion. Or a false church, just so he can 'check the box' of religion. Attend church - check!


14 posted on 04/20/2005 8:21:32 AM PDT by Sax
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To: SmithL

You can find Morford in church every week. "The Church of the Broken Phallus".

Morford?

STFU, you've got nothing to say to this Pope, or ANY Pope.


15 posted on 04/20/2005 8:21:37 AM PDT by Mad Mammoth
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To: fortunecookie
You know what we wanted? More sex. Love. Good TV. Gender freedom. Better wine. Less sneering doctrine and homophobia and sexism and more fun with condoms and music and spiritual joy. But, instead, we got you

Number one, i doubt he is Catholic and number two, i am sure that perhaps Wiccans or some other suitably sybaritic Church would be glad to have him!

16 posted on 04/20/2005 8:22:03 AM PDT by xsmommy
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To: SmithL

What a flamer. LOL. So many gays really hate the Catholic church. OK. Mark MOFO may not be gay but he does a good impression of an enraged gay and not just in this column.


17 posted on 04/20/2005 8:24:01 AM PDT by dennisw ("Sursum corda")
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To: SmithL

RE: See, most spiritually progressive peoples the world over were sort of hoping for a new pope who would recognize this as a historic opportunity

Most Catholics in countries with truly massive Catholic populations (e.g. those besides the US) and even many in the US are comforted that conservatism will reign supreme. Too bad Marky, the world is going against you.


18 posted on 04/20/2005 8:24:40 AM PDT by GOP_1900AD (Stomping on "PC," destroying the Left, and smoking out faux "conservatives" - Take Back The GOP!)
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To: Cyclopean Squid
From the sound of this guy, he should look into the Unitarian Church.

BINGO! Oops, sorry! Bingo is too CATHOLIC for Unitarians - they are more amenable to "psychic fairs" and such! ;-)

19 posted on 04/20/2005 8:24:53 AM PDT by albertp (Malice in Blunderland, The Wizard of Odd, Gullible's Troubles! Steal the wealth, spread the poverty.)
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To: xsmommy

Markie should be so lucky to whipped with wet noodles by some female wiccans


20 posted on 04/20/2005 8:25:34 AM PDT by dennisw ("Sursum corda")
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