Simple, you can choose to pretend to believe. As a child and young adult, I tried and tried to believe, but it just didn't take. I 'pretended' to believe by going to church and even participating in bible study activities. Eventually, I realized that I really didn't believe, and also realized that church was largely a social occasion for me, and stopped going.
Exactly. You either really believe, forthrightly don't believe, or engage in hypocrisy. You don't "choose" to believe. It's not like ordering off a menu.