Well, since it seems like you're asking for input, I'll pipe up. Try to have a baby. The horses can wait. You might wonder why you even wanted to do that sort of stuff after you have a child.
It's totally fair to have a child at 40....if you can. Most women's fertility starts going downhill at 27, so I know this sounds kind of harsh, but you're behind already. I'm speaking from experience, BTW. You have a small window of opportunity now, and if you want to play now, and pay later (awful infertility treatments that cost a fortune and are rarely successful) it's your choice.
Of course, adoption is also an option....a great one IMO, but it's not for everyone. It costs a lot, and takes a lot of time, so 40 for many adoptive parents ends up looking really young.
Best of luck to you.
I didn't know I was asking for advice, really, I have given this a lot of thought and know my situation well enough, but I'm open to discussion.
Try to have a baby. The horses can wait. You might wonder why you even wanted to do that sort of stuff after you have a child.
My horse can't wait, he's aged. His time for trail riding is now or never. If you're right, and we never got into trail riding and wanted rid of the horses in our life, I would hate that outcome. My dream has been to have horses and a companion to ride with me in the woods. My goal is to operate a boarding stable and care for many more than my own as a business. That is the life plan we had in mind when we married, I don't want to turn that upside-down on a whim.
It's totally fair to have a child at 40....if you can. Most women's fertility starts going downhill at 27, so I know this sounds kind of harsh, but you're behind already.
I know you are right about being behind. My mom died at 58 of cancer, and she is not the only terminal cancer in my family. If I didn't get cancer, I might be the only one. I don't know what my life expectancy is, I don't want to abandon a child as young as I was left by my mom, and I don't know if my genes are particularly good to pass on. I think about that a lot.
Of course, adoption is also an option....a great one IMO, but it's not for everyone. It costs a lot, and takes a lot of time, so 40 for many adoptive parents ends up looking really young.
This is an option my husband and I have talked about. But in terms of adopting an older child, one who would not be disadvantaged by our age if we adopted later on.