I am a 22 yr old recent college grad who has seen anorexia in its earliest and most severe stages. As for recovery and helping your daughter. Get her a journal. Talk with her as much as possible, not about eating but about life, about her past semester. Stressors in her life. How does she generally handle stress, is she a perfectionist, has she had trouble transitioning into college in her first year and a half? Talk to her friends, if she went to school with friends talk to them if possible, or others who she has kept in touch with, often times they will know much more about what is happening in your daughters life than she would ever be willing to admit to you. A friend of mine who suffered from the illness late in high school and through her first two years of college was unsure of her sexuality. How is that issue addressed in your family and community? Do you think you could openly speak with her about such an issue? My friend after 2 years of battling the disease and moving back and forth from anorexia to bulimia was confronted by her mother and was back to normal in no time.
Others personal friends have had the disease develop over time for various reasons (nothing quite as specific as the first) and those seem much harder to combat. Of the 3 others that I've known one began binging and purging after confronted by parents, was able to hide it for so long that her four front teeth rotted out due to the stomach acid. Two I know have been helped a great deal by meeting with a nutritionist regularly. One girl actually has been at a healthy weight for 5 years now although she regressed her first year of college (she roomed with a girl who was bulimic), she has been "okay" since. Lastly, I have a sister in-law who has had the disease for 10+ years. Numerous interventions, causal talks, nutritionsits have been of no help. She did not have her menstrual period for years (others missed for months at a time during their most severe stages of the illness) yet was able to get pregnant and have two children. I have researched this issue so much and found little help. You are lucky, it is early in its stages and the sooner you put together a plan of action the more likely you will be able to help her. I, like you, am using these posts to look for more answers, help, useful suggestions...
Things I suggest being on the lookout for if she is in denial. If she is pressured to eat since she is now home she may move to bulimia. Large amounts of food in short amounts of time, generally they will drink pop or something with carbonation (it makes vomiting easier). Keep an eye out for marks on the back of her dominant hand from gagging herself if you suspect she has moved to bulimia, or long showers after a meal, brushing teeth constantly after using the bathroom after a large meal. Also, be on the lookout for her use in laxatives, or diet pills such as Trimspa or other like that, very dangerous. I have found that people with this disease become very deceptive very quickly, check in other medicine or tylenol bottles for diet pills that she may be hiding. When eating at the table (if your family does) watch her very closely, does she distract your attention to other things while she puts food in her napkin? gives it to the dog? hides it under her plate until she gets up, or just pushes it around to look like it was eating. Wow, it seems as though I could go on for days about signs to look for, I am sure you have read a great deal of this by now from other posts and online sites. I hope that this was somewhat helpful to you and your family and please post and keep us updated on your progress or help you have found along the way.
I wish you nothing but the best of luck. Please be sure to hug your daughter and tell her that you love her. Whatever happens do not give up until she is better.
Yup. At this point, his daughter is her own worst enemy. She cannot be trusted to take care of herself. She is lying to herself by telling herself she's still fat and that the anorexia is okay. Anorexia is illogical. Bony skeleton women are not particularly attractive (especially once you add in health complications from the eating disorder). Unfortunately, this means that you can't reason with her, just as she can't reason with herself. You definitely cannot trust her with her own health; that much is obvious.
Another thing you might consider (although it will be difficult with her college so far away) is her friends. Are they contributing to her anorexia? Or could they help her to keep it under control (after all, they'll be around her a lot). If her friends are encouraging her to be anorexic, she needs to stop seeing them. If they are a problem, you should not let her return to school right away.
Thank you for your help and advice, and tips. You describe a scenario we are far from--thankfully!--but we will be on sharp lookout.