Well, you're right that their insistence on having the word "marriage" in addition to the legal status of it by another name is indeed a sign of their extremism, but there is no offer of compromise on civil unions because its no compromise at all for those wanting to be consistent. It makes no sense to protect the word "marriage" but leave the concept and institution of it open to radical change.
I'm well aware of the exit polls that showed a majority in favor of either gay marriage or civil unions, but in 8 of the 11 states to ban gay marriage the voters also banned civil unions. This included the battleground states of Ohio and Michigan. I think its safe to say that if it is truly left to the people and/or state legislatures, then no state in the South would recognize civil unions. Or the Rocky Mtn West. Or the Breadbasket. Or the Sunbelt. Or most of the Midwest. This holds true now and for the foreseeable future.
So if the Left were indeed happy to settle for this euphemistic game and have civil unions instead of gay marriage, then they would be in the exact same position they are now with regards to gay marriage in most parts of the country. In other words, they would have to have it imposed by the Courts as most states would not voluntarily recognize them.
"I'm well aware of the exit polls that showed a majority in favor of either gay marriage or civil unions, but in 8 of the 11 states to ban gay marriage the voters also banned civil unions."
The Left learned from their defeat. Already, in Massachusetts, they have been plotting a referendum to "ban gay marriage, and allow civil unions" (with all the same rights as marriage.) That will be their new tactic.
There are rumors in the papers that Connecticut will be the next target, and they have the support in the legislature for "civil unions", and RINO governnor Rell may sign it to ward off a strong reelection challenge from Senator Dodd.
I fully anticipate "civil unions" (gay marriage, by another name) in the Northeastern and West Coast states within 5 years. They were outsmarted by the right on the wording of ballot initiatives in 2004, but they won't be forever.