Please to stop me if you heard this one before...
An Arab, a Syrian and a Palestinian were captured by cannibals. The chief comes to them and says, "The bad news is that now we've caught you and we're going to kill you. We will put you in a pot, cook you, eat you and then we're going to use your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that you can choose how to die."
The Arab says, "I will take the sword." The chief nods to his greatest warrior, the Arab shouts, "Allah Akbar!" and his head is lopped off.
The Syrian says, "an IED Belt for me please." The chief gives him the explosive belt, the Syrian runs into the market yelling, "Allah Akbar!" and blows himself up.
The Palestinian says, "Gimme a fork!" The chief is puzzled, but he shrugs and gives him a fork. The Palestinian takes the fork and starts jabbing himself all over--the stomach, the sides, the chest, everywhere. There is blood gushing out all over, it's horrible. The chief is appalled and asks, "AHMED! what are you doing?"
And the Palestinian responds, "So much for your canoe you stupid cannibal!