In a devastating memo, recently produced by me, CBS news anchor, Dan Rather:
ADMITS that he is actually, none other than Boston Globe columnist and long time White House sock puppet:
HELEN THOMAS. In angry, chicken-scratch-like writing, Helen declares via this memo that the "glass ceiling" prevented her, a "woman" from anchoring an evening news broadcast. Disguising herself as a man was her only option for broadcast success. THIS IS ACCURATE TO MY SATISFACTION!!!