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Chupacabra's "Cousin" Found in Valparaiso
Inexplicata ^ | 8/21/2004

Posted on 08/30/2004 5:33:47 PM PDT by SteveH

CHUPACABRAS "COUSIN" FOUND IN VALPARAISO

Written By: Inexplicata

Posted: 8/21/2004

Specialists from the Museum of Natural History subjected the carcass of a specimen found in Cerro Cordillera to a battery of tests.

The situation came about a few days ago at the home of Manuel Otazo, who found the corpse of a strange animal inside a doghouse belonging to one of his animals. "We perceived the foul smell and thought at first that someone had thrown away fish byproducts. But then we saw that our pet was frightened and didn't want to go into his doghouse. Upon inspecting it we came across this monster," said Sonia Valdivia, the terrified homeowner.

Manuel Otazo explained that the animal had a small head and red fur, with large fangs, claws and hands resembling wings, different from any rodent or known domestic animal. "Before running it at night we would hear noises on the rooftops and hens and rabbits died recently at a neighbor's house. We think it could be the Chupacabras or one of his relatives that was wounded and came to die in our pet's doghouse."

After burying it, the owners subsequently contacted the Museum of Natural History of Valparaiso, who transferred the specimen to their facilities.

The animal was submerged in a special brine. Fernando Soto, professor of Biology, reported that the carcass -- in advanced stages of putrefaction -- will be submitted to a treatment based on choleopterids that devour flesh and bone to recover the skeleton. The bones will be compared later on with the anatomies of known species.

Despite the a priori exam performed on the animal, he noted that while it could be a dog or a cat, he was surprised by some strange features such as the absence of incisors, the size of its extremities and the color of its fur.

The Museum of Natural History says that it isn't so unusual to run into strange species in the area. Only a few months ago, they received the carcass of a pig with three eyes. "The owners, who were from Cerro Barns, decapitated it at once, because they thought it was a thing of the devil rather than a genetic aberration."

Translation (c) 2004. Scott Corrales, Institute of Hispanic Ufology (IHU). Special thanks to Liliana Nzqez.


TOPICS: Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: chupacabra; cryptozoology; monster; specialbrine; turass
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To: SteveH

VALPARAISO? Valparaiso, Indiana?

Saw a coon down there one time, must have been about forty pounds. Think this creature might have been a coon?


21 posted on 08/30/2004 6:24:02 PM PDT by alloysteel
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To: SteveH
From the manual page for SGI IRIX's "apanel" audiopanel software:

Ingredients:

Months, sweat, Motif, ViewKit, TLC (a preservative), Audio Library 2.0, caffeine, Xt, fried DEF (a preservative), Xlib, cooked funky niblets (a preservative), math, red dye #5 (an artificial coloring), grace (a preservative), partially hydrogenated chupacabra oil.

22 posted on 08/30/2004 6:25:01 PM PDT by ikka
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To: SteveH

I have always suggested that the Chupacabra might be some nasty bat creature. Either that, or sicko humans who eviscerate and desanguinate innocent animals.

WHOO HOO! My namesake LIVES... err... decomposes... but hey, close enough!


23 posted on 08/30/2004 6:57:32 PM PDT by locochupacabra (If God didn't want us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat.)
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To: Darksheare

Sure 'bout that?


24 posted on 08/30/2004 7:33:35 PM PDT by Professional Engineer (Who knew it would be so much fun to watch a baby learn to grab her toes.)
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To: SteveH

I live in Panama and this is nothing but hysterical crap. This chupacabra "stuff" was good for several months here (about ten year ago) for newspaper rag sales. Latins love these type of stories...It's a Latin thing even if the stories are not true.


25 posted on 08/30/2004 8:13:03 PM PDT by GatĂșn(CraigIsaMangoTreeLawyer)
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To: SteveH

Groan!

How much land in the United States will have to be set aside as 'habitat' for this new monster species?


26 posted on 08/30/2004 8:36:13 PM PDT by Ole Okie
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To: Ole Okie
How much land in the United States will have to be set aside as 'habitat' for this new monster species?

Fortunately, none, since Valparaiso is in Chile... ;-)

27 posted on 08/30/2004 9:35:10 PM PDT by SteveH
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To: Ole Okie
How much land in the United States will have to be set aside as 'habitat' for this new monster species?

Chupacabras eat goats, so the land will have to be stocked with plenty of goats. Fortunately, goats are not endangered (YET!). If Chupas ate spotted owls, then this would be a real problem!

28 posted on 08/31/2004 2:37:39 AM PDT by Maurice Tift
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To: SteveH

Save the goatsucker!

My new project.


29 posted on 08/31/2004 2:39:56 AM PDT by Jet Jaguar (Who would the terrorists vote for?)
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To: Professional Engineer

Pretty sure, keywords don't say it's my fault.
So I can relax.
Right?


30 posted on 08/31/2004 8:42:40 AM PDT by Darksheare (Inspiring bad ideas since October 2, 2000!)
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To: Husker24

31 posted on 08/31/2004 8:45:50 AM PDT by Cincinatus (Omnia relinquit servare Republicam)
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To: el_chupacabra

Friend of yours?


32 posted on 08/31/2004 8:48:45 AM PDT by ArrogantBustard (Western Civilisation is aborting, buggering, and contracepting itself out of existence.)
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