I'll have to agree with you there. The lipstick lezzies I know are not activists.
The same is true of many gay men. I had two neighbors who were admittedly gay but never acted that way. They were actually the best neighbors on the street. They both were very friendly, athletic, and very male. They didn't run around holding hands or hanging out with gay crowds or gay places. My wife says they were a shamless waste of male flesh. She had a lot of female co-workers she would have liked to set them up with. They sold their house and moved closer to where they worked. We miss them.
I do not endorse a gay lifestyle because of my fundamental belief system, but these guys were easy to tolerate because they were such otherwise good people. They both voted for Bush in 2000 and probably hate Kerry worse than Gore. I think in time they will both realize that they are capable of being whatever they want to be.
Got to head home.
See Later, tell your hubby we need to go flying.