Posted on 07/31/2004 5:18:29 PM PDT by Keyes2000mt
I put my co-pay and a small donation on my credit card. It's a lot less than I thought I'd have to pay. I'm relieved, since I have student fees and rent coming up. More waiting. I get very hungry. I wish I had eaten breakfast before coming. I look over the pamphlet and discover NuvaRing. It sounds great and so much more convenient than the Pill. My regular doctor had not mentioned it. I had no idea there was something so easy available. I'm excited to get started with that right away.
Three hours after first arriving, it's finally time. I'm led to a bathroom and told to empty my bladder and put a pad in my underwear. I'm then led to another room where I strip from the waist down and lie on a table. I realize that I'm not even nervous. I feel a little awkward lying on a table with no pants, but nothing too bad. The doctor comes in, introduces himself, and shakes my hand. A woman stands next to me and starts some small talk. It gets my mind off what's going on. I barely feel a thing at first. The woman next to me warns I'll soon hear the vaccuum turn on and feel some cramping. It was still a bit surprising to feel cramps so suddenly. It is uncomfortable, but not painful. More small talk. She's a cat person but her apartment won't allow them. I sympathize.
Finally, I hear the machine shut off, and the woman next to me says it is hopefully over. The doctor confirms. All the important parts have been removed. I'm done.
The doctor reminds me of the importance of scheduling a follow-up exam before leaving the room. As soon as I sit up, the cramps get a lot better. I get dressed and go into the recovery room. I'm still hungry, and a little cold, but am feeling pretty good. The cramps aren't that bad, and I'm relieved to have the procedure done.
I tell the woman I have decided on the NuvaRing. We discuss that and go over my aftercare. 7 days of antibiotics. No sex, tampons, or lifting over twenty pounds for two weeks. Nothing I can't handle. I'm reminded once more to make an appointment for a follow-up exam in three to four weeks. I get a small brown bag with papers describing everything I was told about, a bottle of antibiotics, and my first NuvaRing. Another woman checks my blood pressure and temperature again. My blood pressure has come back down.
I'm hungry, and I want a nap, but I'm feeling good about my decision, and relieved that it's over. My roommate takes me for lunch and drops me off at home before heading into work. I'm hardly bleeding at all.
I talk to my mom on the phone a few hours later. I lie and say that nothing's new in my life. I know she wouldn't approve, but I also know she's not ready to be a grandmother yet.
Feb. 7: After a few days of just light spotting, it's starting to feel like a period flow. I haven't used pads in over ten years. It feels strange.
I make the appointment for my follow-up exam. It will be on February 25, exactly three weeks after the procedure. They'll make sure there were no complications, and I'll get the chance to buy more NuvaRings.
Walking home from the store, I hear a baby wailing through an apartment window on my street. I chuckle to myself and think how happy I am that won't be my window later this year.
To simply say "I'm not sorry" or "I don't regret it" is not strong enough. Having an abortion was the best decision I ever made. I'm glad I did it, and I'm 100% confident that I made the right choice for myself, my lover, and our situation. It's not right for everyone, but it was right for me, and I'll do everything in my power to make sure every woman has the opportunity to decide if it is right for her without legislation making that decision for her.
Any pregnancy will change your life, whether you have the baby or not. It should be up to us how we let it change us.
(Excerpt) Read more at imnotsorry.net ...
Thanks!
stands2reason,I hold your hand.
Don't be so sure. I had a friend who had an abortion years before I met her. At that time, she said that there was nothing that would've convinced her not to get it. Not an ultrasound, not hearing the heartbeat. She just wanted it done. She said that, at the time, her heart was dead. She said that she had no soul and all there was inside was a cold, calculating determination.
When I met her, she was a evang. Christian with several wonderful children that she loved very much.
I knew another woman who had an abortion about five years before I met her. She wasn't sorry that she had the abortion, but later she couldn't have children and she always felt that this was justice. How she could say that having the abortion wasn't wrong, but feel that she was being punnished for it be being sterile, I'll never understand. Denial runs deep.
Yes, there are women who are that cold. Some of them warm up later, and some never do.
HoustonCurmudgeon,So nice a story.:)
You find yourself in the same pickle that MANY of us have dealt with. You were taught that abortion was OK. I was taught that sex for the sake of pleasure (even with a stranger) was perfectly natural and acceptable. We were young and we believed what society had taught us. We based our actions on these lies and now we're the ones paying the consequences. All we can do is try to get the message out that the old laws were in place for a reason. I'm honestly sorry that you can't have a baby, but I don't believe that God punishes those who truly repent.
Don't ever think that God doesn't forgive. He does. If you think a 'religious' person would say you are being punished for never being able to have children when you wanted them, then that person is sanctimonious, and so very very wrong.
I'm not justifying your abortion situation, no, never, but sometimes women react to outside influences instead of following their natural God-given maternal instincts.
Every action produces consequences, but know that God is a forgiving God, if there is true contrition. Now it's time to forgive yourself.
God Bless you!
MMJ
Dear Stands:
I'm so sorry for you. Please accept my sincere compassion and sympathy for you.
MMJ
I agree this is a horrible Story and it makes her sound like an evil callous woman,if she had no feeling about what she did, she also would have nor problem giving birth to the baby and throwing the baby in the dempsey dumpster, or beating it to death. The problem is women who have no intention of being or of wanting to be a "Mother" just sex for fun without the worry of pregnancy or disease.
Adoption would be ideal for un-wanted babies, but the point is women refuse to give up 9 months of there life to being pregnant for someone else.
I see this as a no win situation....Baby and Child abuse is on the rise inside and outside the womb..
Maybe the answer is if you don't plan on being a mother but want to have sex then have your tubes tied, then when you want to be a Mother adopt one of the million un-wanted children that are needing loving parents...
I am not here to get on a soap box, but I want to share a little with you.
I was 24, single, and wound up pregnant by someone I thought loved me. He loved what I could do for him.... As my belly grew, he became more repulsed by me, because I wasn't sexy anymore (my flat stomach was gone!)...
It was rough being single and pregnant in the days, before it became "fashionable". When the doctor told me I was pregnant, he automatically had his office call the hospital for an abortion. I literally got off the table and ran out of the office.
I wanted my baby. I knew things would be difficult, and it hurt my family terribly. My father disowned me temporarily, but then came to his senses.
I struggled with the possibility of giving up the baby for adoption. The father wanted me to do that.. he was shocked when one day, I told him, no, that's MY baby.. I'm raising this child. I sought counseling from my priest and he told me "Out of something bad, comes something good."
Long story short, that was 25 years ago. My son is 25, and a sergeant in the US Marine Corps. The father was mean to both of us, and wanted nothing to do with him. He was a miserable person, so it's his loss!
I raised my son alone, with no help from anyone. It was an awful cross at times, I worked my butt off, but I had some friends who were good to us. He had everything a "normal" two parent family gave a child.
I thank God every single day, that I have him. He is such a good young man. He's my hero!! Sometimes I look back on the choice I could have made, and I shudder. I'm so glad I chose life for my son. I could never have lived with myself otherwise.
Strangely enough, I am still single, never married, just never found the right guy. But I have my wonderful son. If I had aborted him, I would never know this unending joy and love.
I pray for women who have had abortions, because all of their lives there will be a void they won't be able to fill.
Abortion is about choice?? Ladies, after you made your "choice", there is no more choice, just consequences.
MMJ
Incidently, my mother happens to be "pro-choice" as well. She always made the argument to me that no woman "wants" an abortion but it is at times something that just has to be done.
I love my mother, but I don't think I will point any of this out to her. The biggest problem with her is that she is the epitome of the upper-class kool-aid drinking ultra-liberal. She will find a reason to defend this. As far as I know, she routinely gives money to Planned Parenthood.
Let's just say I'm happy I was "wanted".
One correction for you, however ... my research into colonial genealogy shows that plenty of women lived well past 35. But to your point, they were constantly pregnant and while plenty of children died young, that didn't stop them from having more. In fact, you will often see the same name used consecutively which is a clue that the first of that name died shortly after birth.
Yes, I have a problem with contraception in this case.
This girl, who never mentioned the father (perhaps she has so many sex partners she doesn't know?), is so "excited" about the Nuva Ring precisely because she can have sex without consequence. And her article seems to imply she's had been using The Pill for some time.
Contraception in this case is a way for this girl to do what she wants, when she wants, with whomever she wants. It would be intriguing to know, though of course "off-message," whether she's picked up any STDs along the way.
Ya see, technology can be used for good or evil. Evolving technologies that tempt us to commit sin by making it easier are not a problem as long as we as families, communities, and nations evolve morally in a positive direction, recognize the dangers, and proscribe the dangerous uses (usually through our moral code, but sometimes through the law). Instead we're devolving morally, and technology in many cases is being routinely and throughtlessly abused by amoral people. This girl is Exhibit A.
Contraception should be limited to married couples (no, not by law--it should be in each person's moral code). There are also powerful and positive reasons for married couples not to use artificial means of contraception--but that's for another thread at another time.
Unfortunately, his 15 year old brother needs more supervision than him! Well..........that's not entirely true, it just seems that way!
Give me a choice between a "terrible two" and a "routine teenager", and I'll take the terrible two 95% of the time!
So I can conclude from this that you also oppose young, unmarried men having access to condoms, I guess.
I should clarify: It looks like you just don't think people should have sex outside of marriage. I hope you feel as strongly about that for men as you do for women - it's a little bit hard to discern from your posts when you're calling girls "whores" but have no admonition for the males they are "whoring" with.
Boys are whores, but they don't get pregnant. We women have been the stigma of men's dalliances for years. Nothing new here.
How is that different than that Times reporter who aborted twins to keep her NYC apartment? LOL BTW, the story you tell repeats itself over and over and over in a neighborhood right to me BUT they sure do like to focus on poor girls. I'm willing to bet that not one PP is located in a rich area anywhere.
If you turned on the television and saw news coverage of a Liars Pride Parade, what would be your reaction? These proud liars are feeling ostracized for their lifestyle and are demanding equal rights. Who are you to judge the liar?Who are you to judge the behavior of the pedophile or the pornographer?
We humans excel at one thing over all, making excuses for our sin. There's always an external cause available on which we can lay blame for our own weakness and depravity. But it just doesn't wash. We are free moral agents, each one of us standing alone in the universe with our own sin and guilt. Utterly alone.
Thankfully, One came to stand with us. The only One who is able and willing to free us if we will but accept His gracious gift.
I know. [Sigh.] People are certainly entitled to their views on sex outside of marriage, and contraception (though I have read some opinions here that I find completely unrealistic) - I just want to see a little consistency, that's all.
Actually, I've met women who had abortions and truly didn't care. These types don't care about religion. They either don't have one, or they make it up as they go along.
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