Replies

Hey Lowbie, I took your advice & set up a phone number.
So, I sent Joshua another email. (Yes, I am bored).

Hi Joshua: I decided to have a private line installed at my office. That way we can keep everything on the down low. My wife won't know a thing....until I tell her about the money after the deal. She will be so happy. I made hundreds of thousands of dollars over the years, but I also spent a lot. I like to gamble, I'm a gambling man. That is why I am going to trust you & help you out. I am still waiting for those photos of you & your brother. Please send them soon. I am on the road a lot, but always check my messages. The phone number is 206-350-2535.
My secretary won't answer this line as I have instructed her not to.....but she is a bit nosy so don't leave too much private info on any messages. We may need to develop a secret code....like the Nazis used in WW2. Or maybe more like James Bond....I'd rather be a spy than a nazi, how about you? Your last name is rather infamous and may draw unneeded attention to our business. I think we should use different names so no one will know who we are (except us, my new friend). My code name will be Harry Palmer. I think you should have a strong name like Harden Long. How do you like that one? If you hate it, I can make up another one.

Look forward to doing business with Harden Long.

Respectfully,

Harry Palmer

I thought I had gone too far with my code names, but Joshua...I mean Harden Long.....just responded. It looks serious now, he has switched to ALL CAPS! Also notice that he used my code name, but his real one.

DEAR PALMER,

I HAVE BEEN TRYING YOUR PHONE BUT I KEEP MEETING YOUR VOICE MAIL.PLS CAN YOU TELL ME THE EXACT TIME I CAN CALL YOU SO THAT WE CAN DISCUSS.I AM VERY ANXIOUS TO GET THIS BUSINESS TRANSACTION MOVING.THIS PROJECT WILL INTAIL YOU TRAVELING TO LONDON WHERE THE SECURITY COMPANY IS LOCATED FOR YOU TO
CLAIM THE CONSIGNMENT PACKAGES.

THE FIRST STEP IS FOR YOU TO BE MADE THE BENEFICAIRY OF THE CONSIGNMENT LODGED WITH THE SECURITY COMPANY.THE CHAMBER OF COMMERCE DID NOT GIVE ME YOUR DETAILED CONTACT.I ONLY GOT YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS BECAUSE I DID NOT TELL THEM MY INTENTIONS OF CONTACTING YOU AND I DID NOT GO THERE MY SELF I USED
A PROXY THAT WORKS WITH THE CHAMBER OF COMMERCE AND SHE ONLY GAVE ME YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS.PLEASE KINDLY SEND YOUR DETAILED INFORMATIONS AS YOU WILL LIKE TO BE DOCUMENTED SO THAT THE SECURITY COMPANY CAN EFFECT THE CHANGE OF OWNERSHIP TO YOUR NAME AND YOUR ADDRESS.

VERY IMPORTANTLY BEAR IN MIND THAT THIS PROJECT IS VERY GENIUNE.YOU WILL SEE FOR YOUR SELF ONCE YOU GET TO LONDON.I AWAIT YOUR URGENT RESPONSE.

BEST REGARDS,
JOSHUA YENGENI.

And so it goes on....this is too much fun.

Hi Harden,
I am terribly sorry about the voice mail, but I had to go on a last minute trip. The hooliagans renting my beach house in Key West went crazy & did all sorts of damage. These people were insane. They did vile & disgusting things. I won't burden you with the details, but lets just say that due some strange fecal fetish, I may need to tear down my home & rebuild. Damndest thing I ever saw or smelled. I plan on hunting them down and doing something just as nasty to to them. You live in a primitive country, what is the most terrible torture over there? I am so distraught over this I am not thinking clearly.

I never received a message, did you leave one? Maybe this new phone line is installed wrong. Damn illegal immigrants can't do anything right....except sneak across the border. Please call back and if I don't answer, leave me a message. If you don't want to leave any details, just say something in code like "the moose has bitten my sister".

Here is my office address: 400 South Tryon Street Charlotte, NC 28285
(This is really the FBI offices)

Also, you have not sent a photo or responded to the one I sent you. That upsets me and makes me a bit mistrustful. Are you series about this? I would love to visit London. I have not been there in over 10 years. The last time I went, my grandmother was worried because she didn't think I spoke the language. hahahaha She is not very smart, but she makes up for it by being mean. She hates anything not American. She won't even eat French toast or Chinese food. That makes her impossible to travel with or bring out to dinner. So, she won't be coming to London with me. I am very excited by all this information & it shows if you know what I mean. I await your response & your photo. If you don't have one with Mandela & your brother then just snap a photo of yourself with a sign that says our code phrase above: "A Moose Bit my Sister"
Did you figure out which guy I am in that photo? I'll give you a hint, I am the handsome one!

Your friend forever,

Harry Palmer