A couple that gets used in my neck of the dungeon.
*Your parents must have been brothers.
*He's the best argument for supporting retrospective abortion.
*It's like a meeting of Idiots Unanimous
*Just in case stupidity is contagious... BACK OFF!!!!
YOU KNOW YOU'RE STRESSED WHEN...
Stress is an evil thing. So here's a few tell-tale symptoms that you might recognise...
- You can achieve a "Runner's High" by standing up.
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before...
- You can see individual air molecules vibrating.
- You wonder if you really need to brew the coffee, or if you can just eat it.
- You believe that if you think hard enough, you can fly.
- Things becomes "Very Clear."
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before...
- Your heart beat sounds like a 'catchy tune'.
- You and Reality file for divorce.
- You can skip without a rope.
- It appears that people are speaking to you in binary code.
- You have great revelations concerning: Life, the Universe, and Everything else, but can't quite find the words for them before the white glow disappears, leaving you more confused than before.
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before...
- Caffeine/ Indigestion tablets become your sole source of nutrition.
- You have an irresistible urge to bite the noses of the people you are talking to.
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before...
- Losing your mind was okay, but when the voices in your head went quiet, it was like losing your best friend.
- You listen to your relaxation tapes on high speed.
- On the way into work, you call your answering machine to leave reminders to yourself.
- You tap your foot impatiently at the amount of time your microwave popcorn takes.
- You take stop signs and red lights personally.
- Your In-Box now has its own office.
bump for later eading.