And, I don't have a great deal of EXTENDED patience any more with parents who are mostly selfish and lazy and blame everything on the child or circumstances or school or whatever. YES, all those things are horrid. But not as horrid as under Rome 2,000 years ago. >>
I'm with you there Quix. I would not be home with my children if I didn't think being here and the time and attention matters to their development. Believe me, we are on the same track. I think what annoys me and others is that the job is made so much harder by the outside influences, but to some degree they have always been there haven't they?
I much appreciate your heartfelt response. I hope you have found some solutions for your autistic child. >>
We are getting there. Fortunately, he has always been very affectionate so that has been a positive. He's maturing and things are changing. He is 4 and I'd say he is functioning at about a 2-3 yr old emotionally still with little speech though. He's started that defiance that a 2 yr old has--he obviously understands us now(which he did not before) but chooses to look you in the eye and disobey--typical for a 2 yr old's development. It still is work to engage him--speech is always initiated by us and it is easy if you aren't paying attention to let the little things with him get lost in the shuffle since he won't speak up. He's getting more assertive physically, but not verbally. Like I said, we are getting there and although I love my son, we are praying to God this next son due soon will not have these issues. We shall see and deal with whatever comes I suppose.
Take care
YOU ARE SUCH AN AWESOME PARENT!
CONGRATULATIONS! PRAISE GOD FOR YOUR FAITHFULNESS!
And yea that your autistic son is affectionate. I don't know how skilled at behavior modification you are. But you can use something he does a LOT to reinforce something else you want to increase in frequency. for example, if he likes reading books a lot or some such, you can pair X minutes (say 10-15 or even 20-30 minutes) with 5 or 10 minutes of verbal or written or some such dialogue or even just with interactive time of some social skills building sort.
You may be aware that you can probably prayerfully watch his face and body language enough to discern with Holy Spirit's help which moments are likely to be more teachable toward verbal communication and then set contingencies which really reinforce such moments. If you see him slipping into such a state, you could suddenly say something like, Son, IF in the next 15 minutes, you say 25 words to me/ start a conversation about some favorite topic/ ask me 3 questions (or some such) then, I will get you a new book; let you watch 60 minutes of your favorite TV or give you a back massage . . . etc.
Anyway--unasked for input, I realize so feel free to toss it if it doesn't fit.
Admiration for what you've already achieved and prayers for even greater.