Posted on 05/09/2004 5:42:13 PM PDT by SamAdams76
ALMOST HALF of Canadians believe it is highly likely Canada will join the United States within ten years. That’s what an opinion poll, released on June 3 (2001) by EKOS Research Associates, a Canadian polling and research firm, tells us.
This isn’t really big news. It simply means that almost half of Canadians are willing to reconcile themselves with reality. Let’s face it: globalization is the way of the future. It can’t be stopped. That means that Canada’s destiny – being absorbed into the American empire -- is much closer than we think. As a Canadian, I can hardly wait.
I must admit: the supremacy of globalization and free trade fills me with an intoxicating sense of glee. After all, the victory of unrestrained international capitalism translates into market forces running unhindered in Canada, which, in turn, translates into a diminishment of Canadian "sovereignty" – that absurd joke that has imposed socialized health care, federal funding of bilingualism and multi-culturalism, and other intellectually-bankrupt policies, onto heavily-burdened Canadian taxpayers. Canadian governments will finally have to listen to the market, rather than to leftwing ideologues and elites, and shed the last remnants of the Canadian welfare state. And as multinational corporations gain power, and national barriers come tumbling down, the forces of deregulation and privatization will triumph, leaving Canadian socialism where it belongs – on the ash heap of history.
These developments will yield less government spending and low taxes, which will encourage stimulated savings and investment in the economy, which will mean more economic growth. More growth, meanwhile, will foster new jobs, products and factories, which, in turn, will lead to a better redistribution of wealth, as well as an increase in the standard of living for most Canadian citizens. And as government regulation will almost totally disappear, Canada will lose any ability to control incoming foreign investment. In this way, it will lose its ability to control its own economy – which is good. The pull to the south will become unstoppable.
The benefits of these developments will feed off of themselves. Just think about it: the Canadian government will no longer have an excuse to fund bilingualism, since the market, which reveals the preferences of people better than any government program can, will expose how economically irrational and unpopular it is. Canadian taxpayers will save millions of dollars. But it gets better: with the dismantling of official bilingualism, Quebec will finally come to terms with what it should have come to terms with long ago: it has no place in Canada. The good news, therefore, is that Quebec will finally separate. And good riddance.
And then, the good news really starts: with French Canada finally gone, English Canada will be blessed with losing its last pretence of possessing any unique characteristics whatsoever. With Quebec gone, English Canadians will no longer be able to say, "We’re not like those Americans," without someone else rejoining: "Oh? And how is that?" And there will be no answer, because there will be nothing to say. Canadian nationalists will finally have to admit the bitter truth: that Canadians are Americans in everything but name. The charade of how "we are different" will come to its long-awaited conclusion.
Finally Canadians will be able to free themselves from trying to be patriotic by insulting Americans. In this way, they will stop negatively stereotyping Americans -- a behavior which has always manifested a dark and ugly strain of hatred in the Canadian psyche. It is simply hilarious, in the most tragic sense, how Canadian nationalists have always prided themselves on their politically-correct tolerance and "multi-culturalism," while they have engaged in anti-Americanism -- a disposition, as sociologist Paul Hollander has demonstrated, that is directly related with racism, sexism, and anti-Semitism. In Canada, of course, it has always been legitimate to be a bigot, as long as it has involved hating Americans. We will soon be able to say goodbye to that pathological double-standard.
We will also be able to say goodbye to the endless smug complaining that many Canadians engage in about how "stupid" Americans are – since Americans do not know anything about us. The bottom line is that Americans in Los Angeles and New York City do not need to know anything about Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, nor about anything else Canadian. That’s because, no matter how much the truth hurts, it is still the truth: Canada is boring – always has been and always will be. Whenever I hear a Canadian mocking American ignorance about Canada, I always can’t help picturing some deadbeat loser and unaccomplished writer who keeps all of his works hidden in his desk, and has never published anything, but simultaneously sneers at the world for having never heard his name.
Just imagine all of the pain that we will spare ourselves once we join the United States. We will no longer have to victimize ourselves with those torturous and emotionally-excruciating conversations about Margaret Atwood and Pierre Berton, in which Canadian nationalists show their anti-American stripes by discussing novels that no human being outside of Canada has ever heard of, nor would ever read under sane circumstances. The celebration of mediocrity for the sake of defining ourselves as being "different" from "those Americans" will finally end.
Thus, with the end of Canada, Canadians will finally reconcile themselves to the fact that they have no separate identity, and that the identity that they think they have has actually been defined in negative opposition to Americans. We can finally stop telling ourselves who we are not, and start focusing on who we are: Americans. And when we do this, the Providential Godsend will be delivered: Canadians everywhere will be liberated from the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation, an entity that it takes masochism to tune into, and that wouldn’t survive five minutes if its life depended on the tastes and desires of Canadians themselves. We will finally face basic common sense: culture cannot be created artificially by tax payers’ money, and if there is not enough interest in a country to naturally keep a television or radio station afloat, than that country does not need a television or radio station.
The victory of globalization means the end of Canadian socialism. And the end of Canadian socialism means the end of Canada, because this nation is an artificial structure that is kept intact by nationalist and socialist elites who exploit their own citizens for the sake of keeping themselves in power. It’s time for the unrestrained forces of capitalism to prevail, so that we can finally abandon our pathetic fantasy of having a unique culture, let alone a unique anything. It’s time to become who we always were: Americans. Long live globalization
LOL! That'll make for plenty big blilingual road signs.
I believe Saturday Night Live -- or some similar show -- once called Cadada the Retarded Giant of the North.
I don't deny that New England, New Jersey, and the New York metro region have many creative people and good businessmen. However, most of these states have state and local governments that are far more intrusive and taxing than their counterparts (except California, Washington, Oregon, and Maryland). The Northeast's financial fortunes are to a considerable extent due to the fact that the Federal government is less intrusive and offers lower taxes than most of the Western democracies. The relatively light touch of Washington is primarily due to the more conservative politics of the South, Midwest, and Plains and Mountain states.
Place the seven states (and an eighth state for downstate New York) into a union with socialist-minded provinces like New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, and Newfoundland, and the central government of this federation would likely turn the region into something like a European social democracy, complete with state-run medicine, cradle to grave social welfare, tolerance for pedophiles and transvestites, legislation against conservative Christians preaching the Gospel, illegalizing home schooling, heavy discouragement of automobile use, 60-75% top income tax bracket, etc.
Meanwhile, the US Senate would be rid of 14 mostly liberal Democrat or RINO senators and the Presidential race would be short of 80-100 votes that are either a Democrat shoo-in or highly likely to go for Kerry.
Parts maybe, but certainly not the entirety.
There are 118 commissioned Texas Rangers. More than enough to repel any attempt.
Natives aren't equals? Equals to whom? Please explain.
Also, 'neocommunist'? The B.C. government is clearly neoconservative.
Of course, those countries would have to adopt the U.S. Constitution and all that.
I'm also talking over the next 200 years. This isn't going to happen overnight. But I believe it will happen.
This would give us (the U.S.) even more enormous control over the globe then we already have. I believe it is destined to happen.
I believe we are headed for a five-nation globe. The remnants of Europe will join up with Russia for a single nation that will be rather poor by U.S. standards. The Asian nations (China, Korea, Vietnam, Cambodia, Singapore etc.) will join up into a single entity. This would include India. This country will be very rich but not as rich as the U.S.A.
The next country will be the Spanish-speaking countries of South and Central America. This will be a very poor and dysfunctional nation.
Bringing up the rear will be Africa and the Middle East. These countries will all join together as the poorest nation on earth. Poor Israel. At some point in the distant future, the United States will help the Israelis acquire a Texas sized piece of land in the Middle East as a buffer zone just so they can have some breathing room.
None of us will live to see all this but take my word for it, it will happen.
Um, ah, excuse me but don't we have a little say in this?
I think much will change in the next 200 years, and current socioeconomic imbalances will likely shift over that large amount of time. But the world does seem to be headed toward settling into large economic/political blocs such as the EU. At the same time, countries do seem to like keeping their borders. At any rate, we will live in interesting times.
We haven't had a Union since 1861 -- it's been yours, all yours, ever since. Or do we need to go over how all that walnut and mahogany paneling got into all those New York and New England businesses and residences, that you don't see nearly as much anywhere else, and especially not in old farmhouses?
And you wouldn't have much of a Texas today if not for our tax dollars sent south by your politicians. Show a little more gratitude for our hard work, will ya?
What do you mean, your politicians? Yankee legislators fought Texas's admission to the Union tooth and nail -- John Quincy Adams led the fight personally, and he fought like hell against John Calhoun's initiatives to assume Texas's debts in order to put some critically-needed specie into the Texas "economy". When Texas was hard up against it, you and yours begrudged her the first nickel, and every one after. You fought her admission to the last ditch. Then you stiffed Texas's debt owners in 1869, in Texas vs. White, because it was a political case about the Civil War, and a chance to preach Yankee "Union" doctrine from a bench full of Lincoln appointees, led by Chief Justice Salmon P. Chase, Abe's Treasury Secretary and a first-rate Yankee thumbscrew. Don't tell me about gratitude. We still owe you a bunch of hard licks for that first go-round in the 1840's, when you didn't want Texas trash in the Union and didn't want to defend Texas's boundaries against Mexican claims. That's not even including any accounting for what you did in the Civil War. Oh, and by the way -- Texas never formally surrendered, and her troops took their weapons and their colors home with them. And that's why all your sorry Yankee neighbors are all in favor of gun control!
Sounds like a fair trade to me - LMAO
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.