Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Colonizing Mars: "Can you hear me now?"
WorldNetDaily ^ | 1-12-04 | Doug Powers

Posted on 01/12/2004 3:45:28 PM PST by RightWingReader

The pictures of the surface of Mars, beamed back from NASA's Spirit Rover, were fantastic. The photos show a flat, barren, rock-speckled surface, awash in a red glow, leading into absolute nothingness; a maroon of desolation and emptiness – like wearing 3-D glasses and looking at Anna Nicole Smith's CAT scan.

If President Bush has his way, manned missions to the Red Planet may in the not-too-distant future, but would the eventual colonization of Mars really make us a happier species?

One of the first problems will be convincing qualified people to even consider going. A simple observation of the success, or lack thereof, of the attempts of many countries to land probes on Mars over the years could make even the bravest of daredevils run away in fear and dampened shorts. The Martian surface is littered with the crashed remains of our vehicles – throw in an old sofa and we've turned the place into a hillbilly's front yard.

Whether they'll admit it or not, everyone who is pro-exploration, such as I am, has a different story for wanting to go. Some of us are simply fascinated by the unknown, some want to go for scientific endeavors, and some want to go because it offers a tremendous feeling of leaving their problems behind. If you're in the latter group, you could be sorely disappointed.

As long as politicians are in charge of the funding, you may only end up in a vacuous, distant, bureaucratic microcosm of Earth – except with really bad television reception.

If you're one of the first to land on Mars, upon reaching the planet, you'll not only be facing danger in an unforgiving environment, but you'll have to do it according to politically correct government plan. Adding to your stress level will be the long wait while Congress debates on whether or not to appropriate enough money to bring you home.

The talk concerning financing a mission is always confined to the mission itself, and never the unforeseen inside-the-Beltway manufactured red-tape expenses. For example, let's say the trips and early colonization run up to $2 trillion. This will quickly become $2.5 trillion if they decide to rename the planet after some politician who had nothing to do with planning the mission. Changing the name "Mars" in school textbooks to "Byrd-land" would alone run a few billion.

That cost will further rise after government bureaucrats spend a few hundred million on a study to determine which of the astronauts has the most worthy cause, because this should be the person who first sets foot on the surface. "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for the plight of the Tibetan people"**

**On the off chance that we send Richard Gere first

The government will also have to shell out another several billion dollars for the inevitable "environmental impact study." This brings us to another problem that Mars already has – orbiters have detected a thinning ozone layer. The fact that it's thinning would suggest that either there are natural reasons for the ozone depletion, or this is an unmistakable sign of extraterrestrial life using aerosol hairspray.

With the ozone troubles on Mars, any visiting astronauts should be prepared to scrap their SUV-like surface transportation systems, and get around the planet by bicycle, lest they face scorching, finger-pointing diatribes from Al Gore and Arianna Huffington.

As far as the expense of the project, I personally believe that corporate sponsorship is the way to go. Why take the taxpayers' hard earned coin, when businesses would be lining up to sponsor a Mars mission? Just tell them their logo will be on the field at the first Martian bowl game and plastered on the side of the rocket, and it's a done deal. The entire trip could be paid for by a wireless company, simply by one astronaut agreeing to stand on the surface of Mars, pull out a flip-phone, and say "can you hear me now?"

I'm all for space exploration. However, our natural instinct of escape may never be satisfied by the colonization of other planets. Some people say the Earth will someday run out of room and resources, so off to Mars you'll go, searching for respite from the misery of earth's overpopulation, illness and disastrous environmental conditions.

After arriving on the Red Planet seeking solace, you'll sit in a crowded Starbucks, elbow to elbow with a thicket of people who are voicing concern about Mars' depleting ozone layer, debating over whether or not to allow oil drilling in the Valles Marineris canyons, and aiming a hacking cough directly into your mocha latte.

Back to the drawing board.

--------

By Doug Powers


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Government; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: bush; dougpowers; exploration; mars; space
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-34 next last

1 posted on 01/12/2004 3:45:29 PM PST by RightWingReader
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: RightWingReader
WWW-III..................'mark'.....!!

:-(

2 posted on 01/12/2004 3:54:42 PM PST by maestro
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RightWingReader
"One of the first problems will be convincing qualified people to even consider going."

Well, THAT's false. A whole trainload of appropriate personnel would volunteer.
3 posted on 01/12/2004 3:55:13 PM PST by Frank_Discussion (May the wings of Liberty never lose a feather!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RightWingReader
would the eventual colonization of Mars really make us a happier species?

Did the settling of the New World make mankind happier?  Well, no.
Why should it? Man's reach must exceed his grasp, else what's a heaven for?
4 posted on 01/12/2004 3:56:24 PM PST by gcruse (http://gcruse.typepad.com/)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Frank_Discussion
Not sure if I am "qualified" but I sure would volunteer.
5 posted on 01/12/2004 3:56:46 PM PST by RadioAstronomer
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: RadioAstronomer
Aye, I here ye...
6 posted on 01/12/2004 3:59:30 PM PST by Frank_Discussion (May the wings of Liberty never lose a feather!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Frank_Discussion
Exactly.

The Daily Record

"But there will be no lack of volunteers to go. NASA sources say hundreds of hopefuls have already come forward."
7 posted on 01/12/2004 4:14:14 PM PST by Ex-Dem (-_-)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: RightWingReader
The photos show a flat, barren, rock-speckled surface, awash in a red glow, leading into absolute nothingness; a maroon of desolation and emptiness – like wearing 3-D glasses and looking at Anna Nicole Smith's CAT scan.

Not typical of the Martian surface. It is considerably larger than the land area of the Earth. Landforms are at least as diverse than those of the Earth, possibly more so due to reduced gravity and erosion.

They chose a flat boring area to land in for obvious operational reasons.

8 posted on 01/12/2004 4:21:47 PM PST by Restorer
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RightWingReader
?T ����?ap� that there are quite a few persons willing to take a ride to Mars and back. Yes, the first one will have a tough time, but look at the settlement of North America. Some settlers disappeared entirely, some had 50% deaths, but still they came.

Personally, I am waiting for a hyperspace drive so I can visit another star. Present a challenge, they will come.

9 posted on 01/12/2004 4:36:58 PM PST by Citizen Tom Paine (Life is but a walking shadow)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RightWingReader
When we get there the first thing we should do is put all those Martians on reservations, for their own protection,of course.
10 posted on 01/12/2004 4:41:10 PM PST by fish hawk
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: RightWingReader
I'm all for going to Mars but then what? There's no other planet in our solar system remotely suitable for human habitation. Travel to the stars is 500 years away, if it's possible at all.

The space shuttle has no place to go but the space station and the space station exists so the shuttle will have a place to go. As for all these vaunted experiments they do in orbit, I've seen similar ones at my son's high school science fair.

On the other hand the Mars rover is great (if they can ever deflate the airbag).
11 posted on 01/12/2004 4:55:33 PM PST by Benjo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Restorer
Not typical of the Martian surface. It is considerably larger than the land area of the Earth. Landforms are at least as diverse than those of the Earth, possibly more so due to reduced gravity and erosion. They chose a flat boring area to land in for obvious operational reasons.

Your post is proof of the author's bias...or stupidity.
I say..."Make it so."

12 posted on 01/12/2004 5:03:37 PM PST by Indie ("Engage")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Benjo
The space shuttle has no place to go but the space station and the space station exists so the shuttle will have a place to go.

For space travel to be truly practical, we need to come up with some sort of reactionless (or almost) drive. We're never going to get anywhere by the high-tech equivalent of throwing rocks out the back to make the car move forward.

Of course, to get such a drive will require amazing advances in theoretical and practical physics.

I see nothing unlikely in that prospect. Personally, I expect we will have such a drive in this century.

13 posted on 01/12/2004 5:11:28 PM PST by Restorer
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: Normal4me; RightWhale; demlosers; Prof Engineer; BlazingArizona; ThreePuttinDude; Brett66; ...
Where do I sign up?

Space Ping! This is the space ping list! Let me know if you want on or off this list!
14 posted on 01/12/2004 5:17:12 PM PST by KevinDavis (Let the meek inherit the Earth, the rest of us will explore the stars!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Citizen Tom Paine
I'm with you, forget Mars, Alpha Centauri....
15 posted on 01/12/2004 5:20:59 PM PST by KevinDavis (Let the meek inherit the Earth, the rest of us will explore the stars!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]

To: Restorer
They chose a flat boring area to land in for obvious operational reasons.

The vast majority of the surface of Mars (95%) is out of bounds for landing with a craft like Spirit and Opportunity due to unacceptable engineering risks. Acceptable landing zones must be; 1) located in a narrow band at the equator of Mars where solar radiation is sufficient to power the rover, and 2) in lower altitudes of the equatorial band where the parachute has sufficient time to work in the descent phase. Even given these restrictions, there are safer places to land on Mars than Gustav crater. For example, Meridiani Planum where Opportunity will land on Jan 24th is considered a safer landing. Treacherous surface winds known to exist at Gustav crater posed special risks in the descent and landing phase for Spirit. Additional engineering safeguards were added to insure acceptable risk for a landing there.

The MER science team was very keen on landing at Gustav crater because it holds great potential to provide physical evidence of liquid water on the surface of Mars at some time in the past. Gustav crater is located at one end of a long, winding canyon that appears to have been carved out by water on Mars.

16 posted on 01/12/2004 5:21:47 PM PST by Unmarked Package
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: RightWingReader
One of the first problems will be convincing qualified people to even consider going.

That's BS. There are about a billion who would do it even if it were one-way and live there forever after.

17 posted on 01/12/2004 5:22:42 PM PST by RightWhale (How many technological objections will be raised?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: KevinDavis
Volunteer? I'm certain MANY people would want to be the first person on Mars...or even the first colonist. To explore, to take a challange, to make history, to do something that is litterally "out of this world" will attract MANY people.

Heck, even I would volunteer. Though, given my last chemistry grades...I don't think I'm qualified. ;-)
18 posted on 01/12/2004 5:27:28 PM PST by Simmy2.5 (Dean...If you want the whole US to be like Gray Davis' California, VOTE FOR ME!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: RadioAstronomer
Dreamed of going to space since I was a wee lad. Spoke of it to the wife one night while looking at the moon on a warm summers eve. Said I'd give anything to go there even if it was for good.

She said she didn't really want to go. Asked if I had to choose between going to the moon and staying on earth with her if I'd pick the moon. I gathered from her response that "In a heartbeat" was not the answer she was looking for ;-)

It was the truth though.

I'm banking on Burt Rutan to revamp the way space travel happens. Even if he just gets the X-Prize he'll have shown that you can do space travel for a few hundred million instead of billions that Nasa wants.

19 posted on 01/12/2004 5:30:04 PM PST by festus
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Restorer
"For space travel to be truly practical, we need to come up with some sort of reactionless (or almost) drive. We're never going to get anywhere by the high-tech equivalent of throwing rocks out the back to make the car move forward."

Here's the thing I've never understood. If someone were to come up with a new kind of space drive hundreds or thousands of times faster than what we have today, what happens when the spacecraft hits dust or other fine but ubiquitous space debris, as it surely must at some time or another during a trip to the nearest star? At speeds approaching some large fraction of the speed of light won't a collision with even so much as a grain of sand be like taking multiple rounds from a 120 mm cannon?
20 posted on 01/12/2004 5:35:01 PM PST by Benjo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-34 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson