"Schism" as a verb! (OK, I'm feeling defensive after general_re and js1138 jumped me.)
GIRL: Cast off the shoes! Follow the Gourd!
SHOE FOLLOWER: No! Let us gather shoes together!
GIRL: Follow the Gourd! The Holy Gourd of Jerusalem!
HARRY: Hold up the sandal, as He has commanded us!
ARTHUR: It is a shoe! It is a shoe!
HARRY: It's a sandal!
ARTHUR: No, it isn't!
GIRL: Cast it away!