Sounds like you've worked some of the Steps without even knowing what they are. Step 1 is acknowledging you are powerless over your addiction, and that your life was unmanageable. You sound like you did that. Step 2 is acknowledging the existence of a Higher Power, and that He can restore you to sanity. You've done that. Step 3 is to turn your life and your will over to G-d. You've done that.
If you want, I can help you work the remaining steps by freepmail. I have a year clean so I'm allowed.
That would be great. thanks.
SD