The New Normal: Singleness in America

BreakPoint ^ | 11 Dec 03 | Chuck Colson

[NYC GOP Chick]

But, consider what he is saying. For example, if a guy won't date a girl because she isn't thin enough - he's a pig. But when is the last time you heard of a super-model dating a hard working construction worker? When is the last time you saw a really attractive woman with an average looking, working stiff. Typically, you see the desireable women with rich guys - face it, Hugh Hefner isn't a super model, but he has attractive women flocking around him 24/7. Same with Donald Trump, just about any rock star, ect.

Oh please. You're taking stereotypes and projecting them onto all (or most) women. It may come as a surprise, but intelligent, mature women look for a HELL of a lot more in a guy than his looks and wallet. Sure, we want someone who's nice to look at and isn't looking to us to pay their cab fare home after the first date, but we tend not to have silly, unrealistic expectations. I guess a lot of us believe that while we're not perfect, we do have a lot to offer and expect the same from men. :)

Now consider the attractive women who go for the 'bad boys', and ignore the hard working 'nerds'. The saying 'Good guys finish last' is a stereotype for a really good reason; because for the most part it is true. Women flock to alpha-males, and alpha-males tend to be arrogant, intimidating and powerful. Nice guys are the antithema to the alpha-male.

Oh please. Most sentient women past their mid-20s have gotten over the "bad boys" and gravitate to real men. To us, nice guys (and nice does NOT = wimpy) *are* real men. We don't ask for more than we offer.

Also, when is the last time you heard of guys playing 'head games' with thier girlfriend, all based from some lame article in a magazine? When is the last time you heard of a guy asking a girl out, simply to make another girl jealous? When is the last time you heard of a guy flirting with a girl, and promising to do something for her if she would only do buy him something first? Simply stated, straight men don't do that. So, when a guy gets used a few times; they get bitter. That's natural, and shouldn't be at all unexpected.

You don't REALLY want me to answer those questions, do you? I've seen guys play head games and I've had them played on me for a variety of reasons. Maybe not based on what they read in a dopey magazine, but for equally vapid reasons.

[NYC GOP Chick]

The former. :)

[Texan5]

Some of the single guys here should take notice that there are some single, self reliant women here that might appreciate a good man...

[Ms. Annie Oakley]

"Here's hopin' there are still a few insane ones out there, then."

If ya find two, send one my way... please? :)

[Texan5]

Some of the single guys here should take notice that there are some single, self reliant women here that might appreciate a good man...

[Ms. Annie Oakley]

"Here's hopin' there are still a few insane ones out there, then."

If ya find two, send one my way... please? :)

[mdmathis6]

"Whew! It's quite a relief to see that Colson is still a dunce."


And what about that article convinces you that Colson is "still a dunce"? Come on...support your ad hominem attack!

[Texan5]

Some of the single guys here should take notice that there are some single, self reliant women here that might appreciate a good man...

[RosieCotton]

If ya find two, send one my way... please? :)

Will do! You do the same, you hear? ;)

[NYC GOP Chick]

Some of the single guys here should take notice that there are some single, self reliant women here that might appreciate a good man...

And more than a few of them should do women everywhere a *hugh* favor and stay that way. ;)

[LWalk18]

You need to get over your mistrust of women- someone who has your emotional issues have no business getting married or having children. A woman does have greater control over whether she will get pregnant or not- so what? Biology isn't fair- if you have a problem with it, take it up with God. Marriage is for the purpose of creating and raising children within a family structure,in any case.

[johnb838]

The institution of No-Fault Divorce marked the beginning of the end of marriage as we know it.

[The Toll]

I love these threads, they always remind me to do something special for my wife. I married the most honest person I had ever met, nothing else was important to me. Luckily I do find her beautiful.
Don't be afraid to risk your posessions, after all do you own them or is it the other way around. If you get burned you get burned. Take it from me, my ex is now a porn-star! You can't get anymore burned than that!
Man I can't believe I admitted that, I was soooooo stupid when I was a kid.

[wjcsux]

I agree 100%. If one is going to get married, marry someone who you are great friends with. As we get older, it is the only thing that really matters in a relationship.

[Tax-chick]

It's not so much that I missed his point, but that I'm disagreeing with him. I think the traditional family is the most beneficial for individuals and for society - my husband and I will have our 15th anniversary and our 7th baby in about 6 weeks :-).

However, the disintegration of the family, and of the society that once was made up of families, is so far advanced that government policies based on a man and woman getting married, having children, and staying married, seem to come from outer space. These are the governments (state and federal) that enacted no-fault divorce and the whole array of anti-parent, especially anti-father, legal precedents. You'll notice (just from this thread :-) that the result is disastrously adversarial relationships among men, women, and children.

Unless we have a society that supports traditional marriages and family life, I have to agree with those who see the government's role simply as recognizing and enforcing private contracts among individuals. That would be a big step up from the situation now, where private contracts, including marriage, are rendered void by the government.

[CajunConservative]

If she uses a pin on his condoms, then she would be pregnant through lies and deception.

Okay, let's see here, now the woman will go to your stash of condoms and put a pin prick in them... Well if you are that paranoid never let the condoms out of your presence. Most women I know would not want to be bothered with the paranoia, it's not really worth it you know.

[Texan5]

I assumed you lived in the city because you mentioned the Bronx, etc. We are way out in the country, but only 26 miles from a city of over a million, where most of the population (about 4000) works-a commuter community. The single women out here for the most part are either widows/divorcees over 40, or college students 18-25 (several colleges in the city) who live at home. I've even heard single ranchers and contractors (at the feed store) telling each other the best time to go to the car pool parking on the main road to meet women as they car pool to/from work. If you aren't near a major city and don't have commuters, then I'm sure the single women are few and far between.

[cajungirl]

Aha,,not satisfied to make your point. You want to tell Freepers not to discuss things with me. So a really "vacuous" person in your estimation should be shunned,,,sounds like you are a bit threatened here. I have lots of good freeper friends who will take your advice to do a shunning lightly. You sir have some kind of problem here. You don't want discourse. You want slavish agreement with your statements. All of which are pretty misogynistic.

[Hodar]

Good lord.... please read the entire post. You are selecting specific sentences out of context and turning it into a personal attack.

The LAWs as they are presently written, support women regardless of the condition in which the woman finds herself to be pregnant. The husband, without regard to whom the father is, or without regard to his desires to procreate is FORCED to comply with 'the best interests of the child'. The fact that he may have taken an active role in preventing the pregnancy from occuring have no legal weight. The fact that he may not be the father of the children is inconsequential to the court.

There are cases where a wife obtains frozen sperm that her husband had put away before his vasectomy. Now, before serving her husband with divorce papers; she obtains the frozen sperm and impregnates herself. Thus, she has secured 25% of her husband's income for the next 18 years. The husband has NO ROLE in this.

Now, what part of this do you not understand?

[Hodar]

Please see #259