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Most moms and dads have to work just to pay for everything

Depends on what falls under the category of "everything". I agree wholeheartedly that taxes and mortgages are high, but when "everything" includes cable or dish tv, cell phones, newer model cars, brand new clothing, expensive food choices, eating out, vacations, etc. I lose a lot of sympathy.

I'm watching my brother and his wife daycare their infant cause they had to have two new cars and a $200,000 mortgage. She couldn't stand apartment living anymore, y'see. They go out, spend on clothes, etc.... They consider themselves without luxuries. It's a tragedy for that little boy who has hired help instead of a mom.

Nobody deserves their 'stuff' more than a child deserves a mother.

What you said is so true and so beautiful yet sad. I cannot imagine for the life of me putting an infant in anyone else's care but my own.

If you absolutely must work to put food on the table and clothing on the backs then that person deserves all the help they can get and rightly so.

However, I find it hard to understand how someone "has" to work when we pass them on the highways in the early mornings in the cold winter driving BMW's and the like. We had one car and it was a chevy and when I needed it my husband drove to work with someone else and left me the car for the day.

We didn't even have a color TV until 12 years AFTER we were married. I didn't have a microwave either ... I had a stove and oven. No self defrost refrig either. I also washed, hung on the line and folded baby diapers. Waxed floors and had a cardboard box with a nice towel in it for our dog. No fancy dog bed. Just a cardboard box. He loved it by the way and slept soundly in it every night until we decided it was Ok for him to sleep with the kids and the kids loved him as we all did.

We saved $60 cash for our daughter's youth bed and made a big deal out of it so that she wouldn't feel left out when she left her crib so her new baby brother could use it. We also brought her a doll home from the hospital so she could have her own new baby as well.

All the while my husband was working a part time job in addition to his military job. He later decided to attend night school and over 16 years of Monday, Wednesday or Tuesday, Thursday and more for his Master's finally completed his degrees. It was tough. It was hard but we did what we had to do to try and secure our future.

He was/still is a good dad. Worked his military job during the day, went to school at night, got up in the wee hours of the morning to study and was a father to our children and a good, loving husband to me.

We had what we had and that was it. But...we had the money for our kids, our dog and for Christmas and birthdays and for other holidays like Valentine's Day...we made paper hearts and put red dye in the milk and things like that. I'll never forget the sight of our daughter at the dinner table in her bathrobe because she had been sick with a bad cold and on her head was a plastic wig she had gotten for a birthday present.

Or the sight of our son with his GI Joes and Major Matt Mason action figures. He grew up to be a kind, good, loving man and his sister grew up to be a kind, good, loving woman. As for our dog...we lost him after almost 16 years. We never replaced him but we did have 4 dogs after him and our current one we rescued from the humane society.

So, while we did not take vacations every spring break (and now fall break) we did pile in the car with the kids and the dog and drive non-stop to visit our parents on the opposite side of the country. The kids played in the back, read, colored in their coloring books and took naps and ate junk...yes junk. They survived.

Sorry, didn't mean to go on but...it is puzzling to me why on spring break kids just can't go out and have fun at home and not travel on a plane to Disney or somewhere else. You can't even go into a restaurant hardly anymore without playthings for kids to keep them amused. What about jsut stting there talking and learning manners? Like yes plese, no thank you, Thank you, Excuse me? Pardon me. I'm sorry. Hello Mrs. so and so or Hello Mr. so and so. I'm pleased to meet you. It was nice meeting you, etc.

Guess I'm old fashioned but I'm glad I was and glad I am to this day. If you dont' have to work don't!!! If you do, you deserve all the help you can get. When I see as I said above driving babies to day care centers on cold, snowy mornings in BMW's and then seeing someone standing and freezing in the cold waiting for the bus to go to work...well, I see a BIG DIFFERENCE there folks. A BIG Difference. God bless all the children.

You've got it exactly right. My husband and I are in our 40's so maybe we've got our heads screwed on a little tighter - we're not trendy anymore - but I would not give up being a full-time mom for anything.

Our son is now in first grade and I pick up a few freelance jobs as a television producer that allow me to write and work while he is in school. On those odd days I have to be on-location, his dad takes a vacation day to free me up to work crazy, long days. Otherwise, I'm there everyday to make his lunch, see him to and from the school bus and have milk and graham crackers and talk about his day after school. Children's' reactions to events at school are sometimes pretty subtle on the surface, unless you catch them in a "safe" moment. When things are fresh some pretty memorable lessons can be lost in the rush that is life. Countering some liberal teacher's statement is crucial.

I realize we are very fortunate, for the time being. My husband does pretty well, though we are not wealthy by any means. We've got a home we love (not the liberal neighborhood surrounding it, that's another story!) that's getting a bit beyond our means with successive 13% ('03) and 15% ('04)property tax increases.

We have never owned a cell phone. We don't have cable or dish. Books are better. Our vehicles are of the '90 and '95 persuasion and I make a mean lasagna or some such dish 6 days out of 7. Vacations pretty much amount to visiting relatives, though I hope to travel more. It was a staple of my childhood. It's wonderful to see all of America so that is a goal of ours.

That rant said, I understand the double-edged sword that is motherhood today. I was under contract to see a series I was working on to finish and worked full-time from the time my son was 6 months until he was 2 1/2 years old. They were very difficult days, but the cash we socked away being frugal is still seeing us through today.