The Star of the West ignored the efforts of a pilot boat placed at the entrance of the channel by Governor Pickens to warn her off. The guard boat General Clinch then saw her and preceded her up the channel firing rockets to alert the Confederate gunners. The Star of the West then ignored a warning shot placed across their bow by the shore guns. Finally, the shore gunners started shooting at the ship itself, perhaps no surprise to a captain who proceeded right along after being warned.
To paraphrase your logic, the owner of the Star of the West got his ship back, didn't he?
There is a difference between holding or expelling people without any threat of bodily harm, as happened with the southern captain and the workers on Sumter, and trying to blow a ship out of the water, as happened with the Star of the West and the Rhoda Shannon. It was only the pathetic marksmanship that kept either ship from being sunk.