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OK. What's Shecky's real first name? (I know the answer)

Chiang? As in Chiang Kai-Shecky?

Actually there is an HILARIOUS but true story involving Chiang Kai-Shek. It happened in the middle of WWII when Roosevelt sent to China what is now considered the WORST Ambassador in History---An Oklahoman named Patrick Hurley. Hurley was so clueless as to different cultures and diplomatic niceties that he inadvertently insulted the Chinese many times. He started off on a bad note when he first met the then President of China, Chiang Kai-Shek when he shook his hand and said, "Glad to meet you, Mr. Shek."

Oh, and when he first arrived in China he got off on the wrong foot as soon as he stepped from his airplane. Meeting him at the airfield was a contingent of Chinese soldiers arranged in formation to greet him. When Hurley stepped out onto the ladder ramp extending to the airplane, he took off his cowboy hat and let out a loud Cherookee War Whoop in greeting. This scared the hell out of the awaiting Chinese soldiers who, despite their careful formations, ducked to the grown clumsily out of fear of this madman exiting the plane.

BTW, I am right now getting a lesson as to Chinese senses of humor. I recently told my Chinese friend, Jessica from Wuhan, about my idea for a Red Guards Chinese Restaurant which would feature a Red Guards theme. It would be kind of like dinner theater but instead of show tunes for the customers, Red Guards scenes would be displayed. The waiters and waitresses would be dressed in Mao outfits and caps. There would be periodic choreographed marching and singing with red banners by Chinese Red Guards girls. Then there would be chanting while waving the little Red Book by performers who would also occasionally drag out a dishwasher or cook from the kitchen and place a dunce hat on their hats and urge them to confess their crimes. The menu items would feature such things as Mao Tse Yum-Yums, Long March Lo Mein, and Chou En-Lei Chow Mein. There would also be performances that used to be popular in the Red Opera that Mao's nutty wife used to put on.

Jessica loved the idea and is now trying to get a Chinese Restaurant to incorporate this Red Guards theme. However, most Chinese don't see the campy humor in this. But don't worry. It is only a matter of time. Eventually in South Florida there will be a Red Guards Chinese Restaurant. Only those with a sense of humor will be admitted.