Guantanamo's Unhappy Campers

Weekly Standard ^ | 2-4-02 | Matt LaBash

[bulldawg]

Go figure - they also refuse to use toilet paper. This is a joke. We should shackle these towlies and make the clean the rubble of the WTC...

[Delbert]

Minty Fresh

[RichInOC]

Give them a tube of Prep H and see what they do with it.

[PoisedWoman]

In the most bizarre twist, Lance Corporal Devin Klebaur says a few have also been known to "put toothpaste in their ass...."

Can anyone make heads or tails of this? Really. I don't get it.

[TADSLOS]

Hey, gerbils have to brush too...

[mountaineer]

They must really miss those goats back home.

[Bikers4Bush]

So these guys are exhibitionist gymnastic landscape designers who have a fetish for minty fresh bungholes with extra whitening?

[kidd]

Al-Quaeda Prisoners in Cuba Have a New Use for Toothpaste

I thought that this was going to be an article about how they were finally going to start brushing their teeth...

I was wrong.

[mountaineer]

they don't just pleasure themselves to freak out the snipers, but also to embarrass the female Army guards in the camp's interior.

The female soldiers should learn the words for "incredibly tiny" in the prisoners' language, and then say it loudly while pointing and laughing at them.

[dixie sass]

Got me! Don't know what this is about kind of a shoddy article and posting, IMHO.

[parsifal]

""so they'll stare at you, and while they stare at you, they'll, uh, masturbate."---Quit being silly. This is a religious thing. It is the Month of Whackadan.

In the most bizarre twist, Lance Corporal Devin Klebaur says a few have also been known to "put toothpaste in their ass"----What is so strange? Have you never heard of the anal cavity? parsy.

[Landru]

A cleaner-whiter smile, I guess.

...Jim Cary-type of smile, that is.

[Hodar]

From the link:
From the February 11, 2002 issue: Some strange things are happening at Gitmo.

5th paragraph from the end:

Even if it isn't up to Rumsfeld, the argument seems rather academic. It's hard to imagine anyone who has actually read the Geneva Convention wanting to confer POW status on alleged al Qaeda members. Doing so would not only make the terrorists eligible for repatriation to their home countries, but also would forbid their being punished for trying to escape, allow them to receive "scientific equipment" from home, and even confer upon them the right to dentures--in case they lost their teeth while, say, biting a guard. Most ludicrous, they would be afforded "advances of pay" in an amount "never . . . inferior" to that which we pay our own armed forces. If you're a terrorist from Central Asia, it's not a bad deal: Kill Americans, get arrested, then get a pay raise from America.

Does this mean that IF the terrorists held in Guatomo Bay are defined as POW's, we (the US taxpayers) would pay the terrorists a salary, not less than the salary we pay our troops (in addition to better cells, food and medical care) for the crime of attacking and killing American citizens?

[Delbert]

replace the toothpaste tubes with tubes of super glue, let them glue their bung holes shut.

[NeoCaveman]

Just please don't tell me what they use the toothbrush for...

[windcliff]

ready for guard duty?

[big gray tabby]

Spit-polishing the stinky starfish, it appears...

[ArrogantBustard]

"making terrain models out of their food."

These bastards are going to try something. They won't survive it, but it sure will be ugly.

AB

[yikes]

Are there any old sinks from the White House we can send down there?

[alnick]

Can anyone make heads or tails of this?

Apparently not the detainees.