- On Neutered and Neutering
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- by Mia T and Edward Zehr (EZ)
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- With all the neutered talk of late
- I thought y'all would appreciate
- a relevant Shakespearean conversation
- with EZ, a clinton chronicler Elizabethan.
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- [I had just asked the playwright if he had writer's block.]
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- EZ:
- Think that thy bard hath now MacJeff forsaken?
- In that would'st thou be verily mistaken.
- Mayhap thou hast impatiently forgot
- That facts comprise the essence of the plot.
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- MIA T:
- Methinks thy bard hath schemes forsaken.
- Mayhap thou art verily mistaken.
- Plots comprise the essence of the facts.
- Forsake the contrariwise artifacts.
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- EZ:
- Gadzooks, could'st be thy bard is put to rout?
- 'Twould seem his veriest words are turned about.
- Could'st show whereby effect doth flow from cause,
- Would'st then be due a round of brisk applause.
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- Perhaps I could this point of view adopt,
- For was not Bill by Hillary thus bopped
- In like wise as MacJeff, upon the head,
- And with a lamp, just as thy bard hath said?
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- Thus are the facts revealed for all to see:
- Thy bard did make good use of ESP.
- Contrariwise, the White House read my serial,
- And sought to make good use of the material.
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- MIA T:
- Thy bard's "effect doth flow from cause" linearity
- And 'twould seem thy veriest good use of oracularity
- 'Twere not the nature of the plots I pricked thy bard to adopt
- Withal Bill, like wise as MacJeff, upon the head was bopped.
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- Methought the plots thou would'st use sprung not o' telepathy.
- Didst thou never hear the most traitorously corrupted conspiracy?
- Brutus's heart wrapp'd in Hillaryous hide.
- Interns and China suckling the impotent fool Cheapside.
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- What more paying play than a corrupted plot untainted
- With thrice times two naked villains feinted?
- Thou art arm'd that hath thy crook'd schemers straight.
- Cudgel thy brains no more, the clinton plots are great.
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- EZ:
- A point well made, experience vicarious
- Was grounded in events utmost Hillaryous.
- Betruth, the president sustained concussion
- Ere I had even started the discussion.
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- But, lest thy bard be seen to make retreat,
- The second bop was truly a repeat.
- In consequence, I need no psychic hotline
- To reconstruct an oft repeated plotline.
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- Now, as regards the wretched Cheapside brat,
- And turmoil his concupiscence begat,
- Need'st have no fear regards unfolding strife
- O'er these events, for Art must copy Life.
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- MIA T:
- Eureka! (Not Gadzooks!)
- Though I have neither wit, nor words, nor playbooks
- Thy bard this simpleminded poster avoidth plagiarize.
- (Withal thy bard's own baseborn tendency contrariwise.)
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- Now, as regards the wretched Cheapside brat,
- And turmoil his concupiscence begat,
- Methinks MacJeff's crook'd feelpolitik, the lasix death, his solipsistic sex
- Thou must put in cold blood'd cardiovascular context.
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- The brain deviseth laws for the blood,
- but the brain 'tself is ne'er understood.
- The King's crook'dness flows from limp circulation.
- Methinks the solution is swift amputation.
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- EZ:
- Thou place thy versifier in a quandary,
- Redoubling thy most sharp-edged entendre.
- The gist of they intent can I but gape on.
- Dost thou propose the prez be made a capon?
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- In blood caught up these wretches play their role,
- But this must not become Le Grand Guignol.
- Lest those of delicate mien be made to faint,
- 'Twere better I should exercise restraint.
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- Mind you, Act I, scene 4 drips the odd bit of gore here and there.
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- MIA T:
- Gadzooks!
- Thy bard's excessive predilection metaphorical
- confuseth redoubled sharp-edged entendre with one blunt oracle.
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- Forsooth, thy bard surely knowth,
- Phallus on eunuch can't growth.
- Plucking capon from hen's an impossibility,
- Unless the cluck's hermaphroditic Hillary.
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