MEN -- ACCORDING TO WOMEN (Hilarious)

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[Cagey]

Just who do you think you are Cagey?

I've seen the light, Oneida. I've been saved.

And, A. McGowan sent me a check

[Neets]

Ahhh..a payoff huh??? And after all this time...I thought you were #11 Up there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIGHHHHHHHHHHHH

[Capriole]

How about just common respect? And common sense? I dated a lot before I got married and I swear I never had any of the problems I keep hearing about.

China, I was just writing that for the guys who can't figure women out and think that we're all cruel avaricious monsters. Clearly you're not one of them. Some guys (and some women) just really don't understand each other and hav a very hard time and think it's all the fault of the opposite sex. I was simply hoping to foster a little mutual tolerance on a thread that seems to be filled with a really horrifying level of hostility and pain.

[riley1992]

MEOWWWWWWWWWWWWW

Shhhhhhhhh. That sounds borderline sexual and if you are not careful the posting police will nail you, "Breaking News" or not.

[Utah Girl]

Pretty funny link, OM! One of these years I will figure out men and then maybe I can quit messing up my love life.

[I_Love_My_Husband]

That article by Peggy Noonan was amazing, I loved it! It made me think too! Glad to see someone else other than me read it. It was profound...she's fantastic.

[Rebelbase]

No comment.

[I_Love_My_Husband]

Hey! I resemble that *last* remark you made! BTW, you realize the *he* I'm with is one of the nerdy types I was telling you about right?

Seeee, everything is complicated with you guys....... :)

[I_Love_My_Husband]

Ok girls, are MEN not high maintenance? I just hafta add that because they think *we* are, but girls, come on, we know it's the guys that are high maintenance! But we LOOOOVE you anyways, guys! :)

[TexasNative2000]

here are 15 quickies.

Are you sure that's the exact terminology you meant to use ? . ....

[AmishDude]

Men are only complicated because women expect too much. Relax and accept the notion that if you expect nothing from men, you won't be disappointed.

[Goddess50]

Sweetie, your rib looks much nicer on me!

[Goddess50]

Dahling...I hate to disappoint you..but I am very intelligent. I am degreed, articulate, make far more money than the average male, well traveled throughout Europe and the Middle East. I am blonde, green-eyed, like sex, like everything from classical music to Rock-a-Billy, like movies from Moulin Rouge to Brian's Song to The Angel And The Bad Man (John Wayne) to Lord Of The Rings. I own my home, my car, my life. I look good in sequined gowns with heels or Wranglers and sweatshirt. I enjoy winter sports, summer sports, camping, hunting, fishing, horse-back riding, automobile racing.

American men like me, European men like me. I can be aggressive, shy, demure, whatever the occasion calls for. I negotiate in the Boardroom effectively, but as a team player. I'm a great cook, conversationalist, and friend.

Hate disappointing you. Rrriiigghhtt. How do YOU spell gorilla?

[Mr. Jeeves]

The big mystery is why the nice men won't make a move.

Our mothers raised us to believe such behavior was impolite.

[Mr. Jeeves]

Further clarification from fporetto's link:

Have I said that a gentleman must never approach a stranger, a woman to whom he has not been introduced by someone who knows them both? Why, yes, I have. No decent man accosts a woman who doesn't know him with an intimate request. What reason would he have to do so, other than her raw physical attributes? Should those be enough? If so, he is a cad, reason enough for her to snub him.

[SCalGal]

Well, our mothers raised us not to be forward.... This combination does NOT make for good communication.

[tacticalogic]

Quote: "What's mine is mine, What's yours in mine, and what's ours is mine." care to quess which gender said this????

I can guess....although I have noticed that as soon as something needs repair, maintenance, or cleaning involving anything more caustic than lemon Pledge, it becomes mine until said repair, maintenance, or cleaning is completed.

[Nitro]

Humbug, it's all the womens fault!!

[Urbane_Guerilla]

If any gentleman Freepers have suggestions about books they think women should read to understand them better, it would be helpful to have the titles posted.

Don Quixote, Crime and Punishment, and Hamlet are the three things women should read to understand men.

[Sueann]

Oh I don't know - I thought it was pretty much right on.

Of course, I don't have a man to pick on right now.