Posted on 09/21/2003 9:36:01 AM PDT by lsilver5
'I am not an anti-semite!'
'I am not an anti-Semite,' Hillary Clinton declared in a beer hall in a German blue-collar neighborhood outside of Buffalo, New York. She went on to explain, 'Die Rede ist von Miniatur-Lastwagen - bis aufs kleinste Detail den großen Originalen nachgebaut. Und das keineswegs nach Anleitung durch einen Bausatz, sondern der eigenen Kreativität entsprechend' to a chorus of thunderous applause.
Last month, a book came out about Hillary Clinton in which the campaign manager of Bill Clinton's 1970's failed congressional campaign claimed that Mrs. Clinton made an anti-Semitic remark to him in a fit of anger on election night.
Immediately, supporters of Hillary Clinton released various documents which attack both the campaign manager's credibility and motivation. 'These charges are so baseless and so from left field that I can't believe that anyone would take them seriously,' Lisa Caputo - former chief of staff of Hillary Clinton - said on the Geraldo Rivera show. (Jokezine.com wants to know whether Geraldo Rivera kept the rusted coke can from Al Capone's safe.)
In fact, these charges were so outlandish and from left field that the Hillary Clinton campaign staff already had prepared a J. Edgar Hooveresque dossier on this campaign manager, which included old letters and other damaging background information, so they could release this information the moment he made this completely ridiculous charge.
Dick Morris - a Jewish American, appearing on Fox News, said that he does not believe that Hillary Clinton is an anti-Semite, but when he was working for her in the '80s, she once remarked to him in a disagreement over his bill, 'You people and money.'
He clarified this statement by saying that he still believes that she's not an anti-Semite, but because of her background in the Midwest, she was always conscious that the Jewish people were the other.
Clinton defenders quickly dismiss Dick Morris' remarks with the usual barrage: 'He's crazy!' 'He enjoys the company of toe-sucking prostitutes.' 'He's not a respectable figure.'
Well we here at jokezine.com have been keeping score over who has a better average of telling the truth: Dick Morris vs. Clinton and defenders. Everything that Dick Morris said about the Monica Lewinsky affair - 100'I've been carrying this body around all day, up and down stairs, up and down hallways, and I look down at my thighs, and they are still so fat! I mean, I run, I exercise, but nothing works.' It was then that I told her about the Atkins diets. It was at this time that she thanked me and said many things about her admiration for the Zionists.
But just when the controversy appeared to die down, the above picture surfaced on the Internet. Immediately its authenticity was questioned. At first blush, according to photography experts at the Brookings Institute, it appeared that someone on the staff of jokezine.com put a picture of Hillary Clinton into his Paint Shop Pro 6 program and attempted to draw a swastika on the first lady's forehead, but he really didn't know how to use Paint Shop Pro that well, so he asked his little brother to help him, but his brother was like 'you are so god-damned stupid, figure it out yourself . . .'
Nevertheless it was discovered that the picture first appeared in the Dallas Morning News, which picked it up from the AP newswire, which got the picture from the Michigan Militia Picayune, which in turn got the picture from www.rickrulespolitical commentary.com. It turns out that the editor of that website Rick Stevens, is not only a republican, but none other than Ritalin Rick - the chubby face terror of Mrs. Ryan's seventh grade homeroom.
Later, however, Steve Brill of Brill's Content examined the picture and said that the picture was authentic if by authentic we mean that it was authentically air brushed on to a real picture of Hillary Clinton . . .
No one is particularly sure of what is going to happen next, but Terry Linsdner, a private investigator for the Clintons has been sculking around the playground where Ritalin Rick is known to play kick-ball . . .
All true, but that doesn't mean he's lying.
Hillary's crazy. She enjoys the company of a man that gets a perfectly good cigar and then..........
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