[litany_of_lies]

Don't disagree with any of what you're saying.

But we do have to consider the reality of 2003. We either think that, in a society that encourages perpetual adolescence and discourages responsibility, that we can somehow prevent all "immature" people from marrying (a judgment call at best by a priest who may legitimately not have the time to full screen the situation, which ideally the two sets of parents should be doing most of, but often don't) or acknowledge that some of the immatures are going to slip through and will need some time to, as you say, "get with it."

As I said on a previous post, sometimes the "get with it' sometimes works when a pregnancy occurs shortly after marriage. But it often doesn't. I'd rather give such couples a higher likelihood of long-term success than (if they honestly and prayerfully see it this way) risk an early pregnancy tearing them apart. Of course if they practice NFP, the chance still exists (and they'd better be open to that, or the priest should stop 'em cold), but it's much more likely that they will experience the relatiionship-enhancing benefits of NFP which will "get them with it."

I know you question the very existence of the need to mature after marriage. I think the problem is there, will continue to be there, and needs to be dealt with. Pre-screening needs to improve and extended counseling probably needs to occur for immature couples, but some will still get through.

[dsc]

"I know you question the very existence of the need to mature after marriage."

Beg pardon? I assume that people continue to mature throughout their lives.

"I'd rather give such couples a higher likelihood of long-term success than (if they honestly and prayerfully see it this way) risk an early pregnancy tearing them apart."

I think the best way to do that is a strict, "You breed'em, you feed'em" no divorce policy.