There's an option you left out - like buying oil from them and not meddling in their affairs or stationing troops on their soil, neither of which is necessary. It's called peaceful relations with all. Also do not forget that the US has a history of regime change in the region and none of it has been successful to date. Chances are continued attempts will only bring more aggrivation than pleasant results.
I think buying oil from them and not meddling in their affairs turned out to be mutually exclusive.
We didn't create the Saudis or Saddam Hussein, except insofar as the propelling of oil to be the most important substance on the planet. The Saudis became the Islamofundie Beverly Hillbillies on the West's nickel. We would have gone on forever happily buying oil and making whoever rich. You make it sound like we went in and started meddling for no reason at all. But unhappily their culture had insufficient institutions to stabilize their countries.