I have a preemie of my own, now almost two years old and healthy as a horse. I remember all too well what those days felt like till my baby came home. Prayers are on the way!!!
A few words for Logan's parents:
1. Visit often and stay as long as possible, even if he is sleeping.
2. Sing to him. Studies have shown that babies are comforted and feel safe and loved when their parents sing to them. I could make dogs howl with my singing, but my children think I'm an opera star.
3. Bring in close-up face shots of mom, dad, and any siblings to tape inside his isolet. Celebrate every day. It's okay to call in the middle of the night to see how Logan is doing; the nurses are happy to give reports.
4. If you have any friends near them, urge the friends to cook them meals, drive them to the hospital, babysit any siblings, tidy up the house, anything so they can focus on Logan. Make sure Mom and Dad are taking care of themselves, too. Also, encourage them to talk about the baby, often, daily. Since there is very little they can do to help Logan right now, even talking about it can relieve the heartache of feeling helpless.
5. Encourage them to get in touch with their insurance company immediately. Unless they have exceptional insurance, the medical bills are going to be whoppers, believe me. Find out immediately what insurance will or won't cover. Get a critical care case manager on the file asap.
6. They shouldn't wait for the bills to start rolling in before calling providers. As soon as they see what insurance will not cover and what the balances are, they should contact the care providers to see if they can absorb the differences or cut the bill. If the bills are still overwhelming, they should file economic hardship papers with the hospital.
My husband and I negotiated down a few bills, bit the bullet, and paid thousands of dollars out of pocket. We are still fighting to pay off the debt. They don't have to fight the same fight we did - there are alternatives to massive debt or gutting nest eggs.
7. Start pumping that breast milk; it's the life's blood for preemies. Easy to digest, builds their immune system. Tell Logan's mom to keep pumping as long as she can.
8. When they touch Logan, they should just rest their hands on him. Stroking is very stimulating to babies, and the excitement is not what they need. They need to rest in these early, critical days. Hands on skin is reassuring, loving, but avoid stroking till he's bigger and stronger.
9. There will be setbacks, sometimes several setbacks. These are not uncommon, but should be monitored closely.
10. If they even think they are coming down with a cold, stay away.
11. They should not beat themselves up with guilt, an all too-typical reaction when things don't go perfectly. People forget how many things go wrong for no apparent reason, how birth is a "miracle" because so much CAN go wrong.
12. Pray, pray, pray. God holds Logan in the palm of His hand.