Replies

No I am not asexual. ;-)

I date often enough. You may not agree, but I see nothing in my bible that is against sex, only married sex outside of a marriage, not that I am taking many women to bed; much to the contrary, but I dont consider sex between consenting adults to be sinful.

My position is somewhat unique, because I have spent a lot of my life away at sea on aircraft carriers. I have seen every form of lying, abuse, neglect and abandonment that a woman can do to a man. I have personally talked men out of killing cheating spouses who refuse to let them see their children. I have hugged men who after risking their lives over the black ocean come into our ready room to relax only to be handed a dear john letter.

I have had to give information to the Red Cross to allow other officer's paychecks to be garnished to pay for children that they denied fathering, but because they were away at sea, they could not defend themselves in a courtroom. I have seen it all, and I want no part of it.

I know that not all women are garbage, but I also know that money can turn many women into garbage before you can say 'alimony'. I get very overheated on this issue, and it makes me seem like I dont like women, but that is not true. I just know what they can do under a particular set of circumstances. It really is not their fault, I believe that men have failed women big time.

But the times, being what they are, I will never, ever consider marriage. I am considering getting a vasectomy, but have not yet gather the strength to do that to 'my boys'. I will eventually because it is too dangerous out there.

My position is somewhat unique, because I have spent a lot of my life away at sea on aircraft carriers. I have seen every form of lying, abuse, neglect and abandonment that a woman can do to a man. I have personally talked men out of killing cheating spouses who refuse to let them see their children. I have hugged men who after risking their lives over the black ocean come into our ready room to relax only to be handed a dear john letter.

You know, PD, I can't fault you a bit for your observations and feelings.

Was talking to a dear friend yesterday about her son, who's served in the Army 13 years now. Got married (faithfully) at age 30, four years ago. To an active reservist. And, his superior. He's been away at least a year in Korea during that time, now training out of town, getting ready for Iraq for a year tour.

His soon to be ex promoted him (to 7th level Sergeant I believe)...then the next day hit him up for a divorce. They had "issues" but nothing so volatile that it warranted something so irreconcilable. He was pretty much blindsided.

What's a guy supposed to think? And how can those honest women out here (yes, we're out here), who are not after $$$ (we're not lazy...we can make our own), even compete with with woment's crap like that?

The whole thing is sickening.

>>"I see nothing in my bible that is against sex, only married sex outside of a marriage, not that I am taking many women to bed; much to the contrary, but I dont consider sex between consenting adults to be sinful."<<

Hmmm. It seems you got the definition of adultery correct, but...what is your definition of fornication?? My dictionary calls it sex between unmarried persons. And also, interestingly: "Figuratively, esp. Scripturally, idolatry." What do you think that means, Puke (a strange screen name, by the way. What's the story on that???)

>>"My position is somewhat unique...."<<

My position is totally dull and ordinary! I'm just a woman who's seen it all, too.

>>"I have seen every form of lying, abuse, neglect and abandonment that a woman can do to a man...men who after risking their lives over the black ocean come into our ready room to relax only to be handed a dear john letter."<<

I've seen it and experienced some of it, too -- the lying, abuse, etc. that men and women can do to each other. Have you not seen men who come back to good women who've waited faithfully or do they all come back to a dear john (a truly cowardly and despicable thing!)?

>>"...I also know that money can turn many women into garbage before you can say 'alimony'. I get very overheated on this issue, and it makes me seem like I dont like women, but that is not true. I just know what they can do under a particular set of circumstances. It really is not their fault, I believe that men have failed women big time."<<

It's true that money can turn women into greedy cruel gold diggers. It's equally true that sex can turn men into greedy cruel predators. Circumstances can change people into anything. But, if you've seen it all, then you've seen a few men and women who resist these circumstances. The question may be: Which kind are you? Which kind am I? My belief is that society has failed both men and women.

Don't get me wrong; I agree with you, in part. I want no part of it either. But...I think what I'm saying, too, is that I want no part of the good. In other words, I'm cutting off all chances at the real thing in order to protect myself. I'm closing my heart. Kind of like what Lewis was saying. And it is very very sad. I just don't know what else to do. On one level, I'm glad for you that you're not asexual, but don't kid yourself, sex outside of marriage is a sin against a Holy God. Trust me, I wish it weren't so.

>>"I will eventually because it is too dangerous out there."<<

Don't do it to the boys!!! It'll STILL be too dangerous to your heart (not to mention your wallet -- hehehe)!

I just know what they can do under a particular set of circumstances. It really is not their fault, I believe that men have failed women big time.

I'm curious. And I'm still learning. Just what might be some of those "circumstances" be? Are these woman "incapable" of earning decent income and/or unwilling to contribute to household expenses, that may or may not include supporting their kid(s)?

How have men failed women? By the recent "emasculation" trends that have evolved?

Having never gone through it (marriage or kids...the later I have no desire for)...I'd be interested to know.