What we, as a society, do not stop to realize, is that it is society that forces that path of learning. We are responsible for it, not those that follow the only path they see.
For explanation:
Just because a male has effiminate behaviour, does not mean his preference sexually (initiated by a rise in hormones) should be for males. SOCIETY MAKES THAT ASSUMPTION. IT IS TAUGHT on TV, in SCHOOLS, DURING JOKES. (Remember the gay male hairdresser jokes?)
Since effeminate behaviour does not jostle the hormones of the females, they shy away from believing such a person would even want to have sex with them.
SO, Everyone wants to be wanted. When females don't want you, where do you turn for love. And I believe it is love that is the real driving factor for homosexuality on both sides of the human sexual equation. Love, not sex. Or I should say, the need to be needed by someone, anyone.
Sex, or the drive to complete the sex act can be ignored, or relieved.
The need to be wanted, to be needed, to feel like someone cares about you, can not. No one makes fun of you for not having sex. (well, amongst the jr. high and sr. high crowd, it can be an issue, but that isn't what causes homosexuality)
BUT, you can't get away from yourself. You want someone to care about you, to love you. I have seen examples over and over of the extremes humans go to to BE LOVED. Even to ignoring sex,if doing so means THEY GET LOVE, COMPANIONSHIP.
Another important, although less driving influence is just that it is so popular these days. Society, once again, is making rules telling kids they have a right to he homosexual. Our government likewise. Is it a wonder those that think they are homosexual, want to believe they have no choice?
I think that may be a very valid observation. No matter how big the difference between males and females there are always going to be those males who are more effeminate than average. And given human nature those are going to be picked on or shuned by some.
And while there are women who would find those attractive, group think sets in and they tend get shunned by women too. Women seem to be particularly bad about the group think thing too. JLo could date the ugliest most effiminate guy and girls would be lining up behind her. What's that about?
But I also think a good portion of homosexual males are introduced to homosexual sex at an early age. One of the reasons I think that is because one of my best friends in the second grade (that would be 7-9yo) propositioned me and said that he and a cousin had done it and it felt good. I didn't know much about sex at that age, but I knew I didn't want any part of what he was proposing. And several other gays that I've talked to admit to having experiences at a very young age.