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You're not alone, DOAIJV. I spent 5 years with a verbally abusive boyfriend. He was so jealous of my close family, my skills, my friends, anything that took the center of attention off of him, that he constantly cut me down. Since this was my first "real" relationship (we met in High School), I didn't know any better. Since the blows weren't physical, I didn't see it as abusive. Then, one day, I had enough and kicked him out of my life completely.

I'm actually thankful for the experience. It showed me early on what I DIDN'T want in a man. If I hadn't learned then what was important in a future husband, I wouldn't have been so incredibly blessed with a fabulous husband that I love to distraction, two wonderful kids, and a life of inner peace (despite too many "rollercoasters" in recent years). We're coming up on 10 years of marriage, and I am still his "everything."

Not surprisingly, the ex-boyfriend still hasn't married.

I'm actually thankful for the experience. It showed me early on what I DIDN'T want in a man.

I can relate to that.

I also know the verbal abuse can be just as bad. It's often a precursor to physical abuse, as well. (I learned later on, from a friend of the family, that my boyfriend's dad had been verbally and physically abusive to him when he was growing up. I wonder what kind of relationship your ex had with his parents.)

I'm glad things worked out for you. Hopefully your ex-boyfriend will get a counselor one of these days and get a grip on his problem.