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Another factor is that I'm just not a good salesman, and dating is at least in part a case of salesmanship. Personally, I think our society has gone entirely too far towards what is "marketable" and away from what is true. I once knew a preacher whose church was too small to pay him and who supported himself as a salesman. He said my problem is the mindset of an engineer versus that of a salesman. If a salesman is rejected ten times, the salesman will go into the eleventh meeting believing that he'll make the sale. He'll say to himself, "I've got a great product. If the past ten calls have failed to produce a sale, the next one is bound to buy." An engineer takes the opposite view. An engineer looks at ten rejections and says, "I've run this experiment ten times. I've produced repeatable, statistically significant results. I know what the answer is. Why am I even here?" Unfortunately, I am an engineer with a strong engineering mindset.

I think that's it with me, I'm a "nuts & volts" type of guy so I definately have an engineer mindset too. The trouble with the sales approach in many things is that a lot of times there is so much fluff that many times you cannot see what is real and that can be dangerous. Then again another reason I'm more of an engineering type is I've been told that "I can't sell water in a desert." B-) B-P

A third factor is that for those of us who don't care for the bar scene, it's hard to meet people. I'm certainly no social butterfly, but I'm not a hermit either. However, I can't remember the last time my normal life brought me in contact with someone who would even be worth dating. Once one leaves college, the opportunities to meet people just aren't there. I met some women in church, but my perspective was always just a little too off-kilter to attract them. Most would say that my ideas were reasonable and thoughtful, but they'd rather date guys who just blindly parroted the "party line."

That's a huge problem, it even surpasses the salesman/engineer one. Bars are a no-no with me. I've seen my buddy pick up, date, and go with a woman he met there and whoa, he has problems like you never believe, it's a long, long story there.

I hate to sound mushy, but I have sensitive side, I know women like that although being too mushy shuts many of them off, but in moderation, it is good to have some empathy. Sometimes I wish things were like 100+ years ago where you go to structure dances and court women, get to know them, and find out of they are right for you. Plus they had games like where eligible men were auctioned off to eligible women where they would have a picnic and such. I remember seeing one episode on "Avonlea" that had that.

It's a shame a lot of things have gotten to fast paced/glitzy/glam in today's world instead of focusing on the simple things.

I know myself, the way I feel, when I do find that someone to marry, at least I can be true to myself. I know on her end, I hope she was the same but I realize we all make mistakes in life and as long as she is faithful to me and I would be to her, well, that would be super.