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"I turn on the radio, and I hear these talk shows with right wing drunks calling in, and I ask myself, where are our drunks?" Faux said. But, he added: "The advantage of being a progressive is that you don't have to get drunk to make your speech."

Take Donahue, for instance. Have you ever seen a more sober liberal than him?

She praised the country music singing trio, the Dixie Chicks, who received a torrent of criticism from conservatives after challenging the wisdom of President Bush's decision to go to war with Iraq. "Can we hear one round for the Dixie Chicks?" Gandy asked to loud applause. "They have lots of new fans all over the country."

Unfortunately, for every one new fan they've lost 10 old ones. And the new fans won't be buying any CDs, but that's okay too.

"You can't have bipartisanship when one side treats you like a tornado treats a trailer park," Henderson claimed.

But enough about Bill Clinton...

Gandy observed: "I have come to realize that is my guiding principle. I want to return to a time in this country when if we can think it up, we can do it."

Says it all. I want to push my radical agenda - comprised of the wackiest stuff I can imagine - through totally unopposed.