Land of the free (A positive article about Canada)

The Spectator ^ | ??/??/2003 | Paul Robinson

[IvanT]

OK, our military history is a proud one, but it is history.

Nyet, tovarish. 1999 in Croatia, as mentioned in the article. 5 Bronze stars awarded to the Canadian Pats in Afghanistan. Hopefully, the Americans will keep up the pressure on our gov't and force us to re arm the military. As I see it, any gov't, whether Liberal or Alliance, will have to do it, there's no choice. Lewis Mackenzie himself called for the Navy to acquire at least 2 aircraft carriers like the HMS Ark Royal. Let's hope it happens.

[IvanT]

In short he is a government bureaucrat and socialist parasite whose livelihood is dependent on the Canadians who actually do productive work for a living. From the point of view of the beneficiaries of massive taxation, not a single penny is unnecessary - after all it goes to them.

Actually, he's an Englishman, and an ex serviceman himself.

[Lazamataz]

[Lazamataz]

Govoryu po ruski harasho? Ya panamaio nemnoga po yazik.

[Lazamataz]

Some disturbing Canadian "facts"

• Canada is our only neighbor whom we do not watch like a hawk. The border between the two nations is not patrolled, and major crossover points are minimally guarded. The length of the US-Canadian border is three times that of the US-Mexico border.
• The majority of Canadians live within a few hours by car from the US border: less than an evening's trip if by tank.
• For years, Canadians have been flooding our currency exchange with their own currency which looks very similar to ours but is worth considerably less.
• Canadians battled with the US from the get-go during the French & Indian Wars, starting in 1755.
• In summer of 1997, Canadian fishermen blockaded US vessels for three days in protest for US fishermen catching "Canadian" salmon in US waters. The Canadians have a maritime boundary dispute with us as well.
• Ontario, in a shocking smack in the face of morality, recently declared it legal for women to walk around topless.
• Canada has no discernible cuisine or culinary specialty of its own.
• Canada has attempted to undermine the one US sport that they do not currently have a team, football, with their backwards "Canadian Football League".
• Canada has long had a history as a drug importation funnel to the United States.
• England peaceably split with Canada, and Canada still views the English monarchy as their head of state. The US has had several noted disputes with England and the English monarchy.
• Canada's unemployment rate was nearly twice that of the US's in 1996. The number of illegally employed Canadians in this country is unknown.
• Nearly 1/6th of Canada's GDP is the result of exporting to the US. Only 2% of the US GDP is the result of exports to Canada.
• During the Vietnam era, thousands of draft-dodgers escaped up to Canada, where they remain.
• The drinking age in Canada is 18, inspiring our teens to pour across the border, get loaded up, then crash into schoolbusses soon after crossing back.
• The magnetic north lives in Canada. Imagine if they decided to move it.
• There is something of an ethnic conflict in Canada between the French and English speakers. Similar conflicts worldwide erupt in horrible bloodshed.
• Hundreds of Canadian students pelted Ex-president Bush's vehicle with snowballs on Nov 19. 1997 on a trip to accept an honorary degree from the University of Toronto. Additionally, during the presentation of the degree, 30 faculty members left in protest.
• Canadians, when presented with the above evidence, usually scoff and declare Americans to be "paranoid", or "bigoted".

[Right Wing Professor]

Paul Robinson is assistant director of the Centre for Security Studies at the University of Hull

The fact this Canada-booster chooses to live instead in a grey town in the Northeast of England should probably be taken as a reflection on his sincerity.

[desertcry]

Which Canada is Mr. Robison talking about? As many of us know, there are 2 Canadas, one loves Americans, the other hates the USA. Unfortunately the mouth piece and has control of Canadian politics is the Eastern and the more frenchy variety.

[-YYZ-]

I've said for some time now that I would vote for the Aliiance/Reform in the next Federal election (if I thought it would do any good in my riding). They seem to be the only party who, if they took power, might actually make some of the reforms that this country's political systems need. This despite the fact that their social conservatism is galling to me. I fear, however, if they did ever take power we would quickly find that they would be as unwilling as all the others to do anything that would diminish their power or reduce their perqs.

[IvanT]

Ne govoryam Ruski, az govoryam Bulgarski. Moya priyatel -'AmericanSoul', toy govorya Ukranski, e malko Ruski.....

koy e 'yazik'?

[desertcry]

Alberta is welcomed anyday.

[IvanT]

The fact this Canada-booster chooses to live instead in a grey town in the Northeast of England should probably be taken as a reflection on his sincerity.

He's an Englishman I though that would've been plainly obvious from the English point of view of the article......apparently not.

[desertcry]

Yes, indeed! Now, if Western Canada could only take control of Canadian politics, and get rid of the frenchy Canadians, I will have a summer home in Vancouver Island.

[Lazamataz]

Bulgarian is sufficiently similar to Russian that I can understand it. Yazik eta slova "Language".

Which reminds me: After we sunder Canada, we will be targeting Bulgaria.

[americanSoul]

Yes, from Montreal, my Thracian friend, but via Germany where I was born, my mother having recently been liberated from a forced labor camp by American soldiers. She was there from the age of 11 to 19. It sure wasn't the "singes du capitulation et mangeurs du fromage" who freed her.

I read this somewhere recently - a retired classical musician recalled how he was liberated from a death camp at the age of nine: "To this day, the sweetest sound I have ever heard was that rumble of American tanks, I knew at that moment that I would live to grow up".

[IvanT]

Canada is our only neighbor whom we do not watch like a hawk. The border between the two nations is not patrolled, and major crossover points are minimally guarded. The length of the US-Canadian border is three times that of the US-Mexico border.

A testament to the friendly relations our 2 countries have always enjoyed.

The majority of Canadians live within a few hours by car from the US border: less than an evening's trip if by tank.

There's a reason for that. Ever been farther north? It's bloody cold up there.

For years, Canadians have been flooding our currency exchange with their own currency which looks very similar to ours but is worth considerably less.

It wasn't at one time in the eighties. I didn't know you had Blue five dollar bills and Red fifty dollar bills with Kingfishers (a bird) and Mounties on them? Astonishing.

Canadians battled with the US from the get-go during the French & Indian Wars, starting in 1755. In summer of 1997, Canadian fishermen blockaded US vessels for three days in protest for US fishermen catching "Canadian" salmon in US waters. The Canadians have a maritime boundary dispute with us as well.

Um, Canadians in 1755 were mostly French and some English, they really weren't Canadians as we are today. At any rate, that's ancient history. It was Americans who were the aggressors at the northern bordor during the Revolution and the war of 1812, so really, what'd you expect our reaction to be?

Ontario, in a shocking smack in the face of morality, recently declared it legal for women to walk around topless.

Morality is in the eye of the beholder, I suppose.

Canada has no discernible cuisine or culinary specialty of its own.

Oh really?

Canada has attempted to undermine the one US sport that they do not currently have a team, football, with their backwards "Canadian Football League".

Who cares?

Canada has long had a history as a drug importation funnel to the United States.

...and the US has long had a history as an automatic weapons/drug/criminal importation funnel to Canada. I have news for you, the border goes two ways.

England peaceably split with Canada, and Canada still views the English monarchy as their head of state. The US has had several noted disputes with England and the English monarchy.

God save the Queen. Oh yeah, and as I recall, Britain is currently your most staunch, of your dwindling cache of allies. So this statement is somewhat the contradiction, isn't it?

Canada's unemployment rate was nearly twice that of the US's in 1996. The number of illegally employed Canadians in this country is unknown.

And our unemployment rate is currently lower than yours. We created over 500,000 jobs in Canada in 2002.

Nearly 1/6th of Canada's GDP is the result of exporting to the US. Only 2% of the US GDP is the result of exports to Canada.

We are still your biggest trading partner. Obviously, we have stuff you want, so why wouldn't we take advantage of that? You seem to like our Hydro, our lumber, our uranium, our military parts, and soon, I'm sure you'll be liking all our fresh water too, seeing as you lot are running out.

During the Vietnam era, thousands of draft-dodgers escaped up to Canada, where they remain.

....and thousands more CANADIANS voluteered, faught, and died serving in the US army in Vietnam, precisely the reason there is an all Canadian portion of the Vietnam memorial in Washington.

The drinking age in Canada is 18, inspiring our teens to pour across the border, get loaded up, then crash into schoolbusses soon after crossing back.

You should teach your children to drink more responsibly then, where are your morals? Also, the drinking age is 18 only in Quebec.

The magnetic north lives in Canada. Imagine if they decided to move it.

That would be cool.

There is something of an ethnic conflict in Canada between the French and English speakers. Similar conflicts worldwide erupt in horrible bloodshed.

Thankfully not here, unlike say, Cincinatti a couple years back, and Los Angeles after the Rodney King beatings.

Hundreds of Canadian students pelted Ex-president Bush's vehicle with snowballs on Nov 19. 1997 on a trip to accept an honorary degree from the University of Toronto.

That's actually quite funny, I didn't know that.

Additionally, during the presentation of the degree, 30 faculty members left in protest.

As is their right.

Canadians, when presented with the above evidence, usually scoff and declare Americans to be "paranoid", or "bigoted".

Naw, we actually still like you.

[IvanT]

Bulgarian is sufficiently similar to Russian that I can understand it. Yazik eta slova "Language".

Which reminds me: After we sunder Canada, we will be targeting Bulgaria

'Yazik' in Bulgarian is 'ezik' quite similar actually.

I think you've already got bases in Bulgaria. Tell me, when is the mighty U.S. going to start a war against a tougher opponent? I'd really like to see a couple heavy weights go at it for a change, no more of this Mike Tyson beating up on Steve Urkell crap, I want a knock em down and drag em out kinda war.

[desertcry]

90% of your Catholics are the frenchy kind, and everybody knows they don't attend mass.

[Lazamataz]

Tell me, when is the mighty U.S. going to start a war against a tougher opponent?

*sigh*

That's the problem, isn't it? There *IS* no tougher opponent.

*sigh*

[IvanT]

Yeah, I suppose you're right. Damn, I want to watch some real maritime conflict, maybe we should get England to attack Argentina again. Those were the days when wars were still fun. I want to see ship to ship combat, and aerial dog fights, not anticlimactic conflicts amounting to 80 tanks rolling into Baghdad unhindered, pulling up to the 7-11 and ordering a slurpy.

[Lazamataz]

We created over 500,000 jobs in Canada in 2002.

Yeah, all of 'em making moose cheese.

Ya maple-syrup-swigging parka-wearing Eh-boys.