Get rid of your debt and you'll get rid of a lot of the stress in a marriage. Maybe you'll even have time for each other and the family.
Procreation is one purpose of sex in marraige, but it is also a therapy for the husband and wife. Whether times are good or bad, sex and make it better by turning to each other and sharing what you share with no one else. Sex can create endorphins, which might just get some people of feel-good medications (which, interestingly, reduce a woman's sex drive) or booze.
If you aren't having sex, I think you tend to respond to each other more like brother and sister: you know how to push the buttons to irritate each other and the feelings of romantic love lessen.
Yes, women generally take longer. If you love your wife accept that and take the time to show your love. I would like to believe that the wife's response will be worthwhile.
Me, I'm waiting for my husand to come home from deployment. :)
LOL...I believe you hon....and G-d bless him for being there!