Linda Bowles Committed Suicide

The Paradise Post ^ | May 15, 2003 | Rick Silva

[Fawnn]

We have been together for 45 years and each day brings new joy of loving her.

Yes, you are indeed fortunate.

About six months after my husband and I were married, we found out he had cancer. He passed away about two years after that. While I wouldn't trade those two and a half love-filled years for anything in the world (except maybe his health, if that were an option), I don't believe it diminishes that relationship to want to find another. Even though I've been a widow since 1989, I find hope when I read that: "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a suitable partner for him." Okay, I know I'm not a man, and that passage refers to creation, etc. I need for my faith to kick in when it comes to my "extended" interpretation. ;)

My maternal grandparents were married for almost 65 years, my paternal grandparents for 55, and my parents for 51. I know those left behind were/are lonely, but I can see your point regarding that type of long-term relationship. It's what I'd expected -- and hoped -- would occur in my life....

--

Changing the subject to the discussions on anti-depressant: I'm sure they help some people -- when used properly and combined with therapy. Part of the problem with anti-depressants is when the person taking them quits cold turkey. A simple google search will turn up the scary stuff about the rebound effect of simply quitting prozac instead of being weaned off of it, etc.

[Republican Wildcat]

The point I was trying to make (perhaps I shouldn't have been sarcastic--I apologize), was that we are to come into life and leave life on God's terms, not our own.

It unfortunately seems that most people who commit suicide loved something else more than they loved God--and that is a mistake. As much as she loved her husband, she should have loved God more, and that way she would never have completely lost hope--even though it would still be devistating.

[sinkspur]

It unfortunately seems that most people who commit suicide loved something else more than they loved God--and that is a mistake. As much as she loved her husband, she should have loved God more, and that way she would never have completely lost hope--even though it would still be devistating.

It is almost impossible to find solace in God when your world has, for all intents and purposes, ended, as it did with Linda Bowles.

True, she was too bound up emotionally with her husband, and neither she nor he could see that, apparently.

My thinking is that she had very little love for herself apart from her husband. A healthy love of self is necessary to withstand the vicissitudes of this world, and it's what gives people strength when they lose the love of their life.

One cannot realize the true love of God if one has no sense of self-worth.

This magnificent woman, Linda Bowles, had to have someone to lean on because she couldn't stand upright on her own.

Love of self comes, IMO, from the profound sense of how much God loves us, individually. Linda never knew that.

[FirstTomato]

Drugs are not a panacea for depressed people, including the clinically depressed. The DSM, the Bible of the Psychologists, is the biggest bunch of voo-doo ever invented. The same person could be interviewed by 10 psychologists and get 10 different diagnoses.

Even amongst similiar cultures, such as Great Britain and the USA, there are great variances of diagnosis rates for severe disorders such as schizophrenia. And less clearly defined and ambiguous disorders such as depression have wide differences in diagnosis rates across the spectrum of severity, that increases with deeper cultural differences. Often a psychologist does not take into account the cultural background of his patient, and a trait that is culturally normal is made into an abnormality by the time it gets on a chart. (school psychologists can be especially rigid in their assessments, locked into narrow definitions of behavior to the detriment of immigrant children).

Its my opinion that drugs ultimately do more harm than good in depression and except for accute intervention there are always better solutions. I just don't believe in those kind of drugs. Some people do, and swear by them. So we'll agree to disagree about this because I doubt we'll convince each other.

[ChefKeith]

Bowles, 51, whose column appeared in the Chico Enterprise-Record, the Houston Post, Washington Times, Chicago Tribune,Arkansas Democ-rat-Gazette

Sounds like one more case of arkancide to Me.

Anybody know the whereabouts of x42 & his "wench" at this time ?

[sinkspur]

Yes we will have to disagree. Drugs are, indeed, a panacea for the clinically depressed on the verge of suicide. I've seen it in my own family.

You will never convince me that anti-depressants are anything but good.

[Alamo-Girl]

Thanks for the heads up!

[ChefKeith]

Your welcome.

How are things going?

[tictoc]

Sad indeed. RIP Ms. Bowles.

For those reading this thread who are themselves contemplating suicide, here's a Czech proverb to cheer you up:

If it feels like things can't get any worse, it will... because the guy upstairs loves you and is preparing you for the REALLY BAD STUFF.

[Alamo-Girl]

Things are great with me! How about you?!

[demosthenes the elder]

This conviction you and many others share puzzles me, considering that Christianity is founded upon the most famous suicide in history. Before you flame, think: It was a suicide exactly as much and in exactly the same manner as is suicide-by-cop today. I mean no disrespect to you, your faith, or that faith's Object. I am merely calling it as I see it.

As to suicide itself, and the extremely narrow interpretation of belief upon which many judge it to be anathema: In some situations, suicide is the only rational option. These situations are few in type but frequent in occurrence. Case in point - I will NOT go out the way my brother did. I will NOT spend a full year in pain so exquisite it makes crucifixion look like a joke... and Jesus had the comfort of having a REASON to suffer, my brother did not. I WILL suck on a shotgun before that happens to me. So, if God really REALLY doesn't want me to kill myself, He would be well served by not laying that test on me. Which fact brings me to the point on narrow beliefs - it seems to me that most of the anathemists are basing their creed not upon scripture but upon a bit of wishful fancy, that "the Lord will never give you a burden that is too heavy for you to bear." To which I say: "It's a nice thought, but it is pure Bullpuckey!"
I am well aware that ANYONE can be tested to destruction.
I have WITNESSED a few illustrations of this fact.
Think before you dispute this. Torture, whether deliberately and maliciously inflicted or a mere side-effect of a medical condition, and its effects are well documented. Progressive insanity is well documented. Destructive addiction is well documented.
Think, and ask youirself: Given such a condition, is suicide truly a sin?

[Freedom'sWorthIt]

Maybe there is more to it, who knows. But I know that Linda Bowles was a gifted, wonderful writer and person. Her death is a tremendous loss.

May each of us be sensitive to those around us who are suffering - silently perhaps.

[demosthenes the elder]

"smile, tomorrow will be worse." provenance unknown

[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

Before you flame, think: It was a suicide exactly as much and in exactly the same manner as is suicide-by-cop today.

I dunno. The closest I can think of Jesus coming to attacking the police was when he threw the moneychangers out of the temple.

[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

I hope G*d forgives her.

[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

Though I was born in 1970, I am, in many ways, a throwback to the earlier culture. Unlike most of my peers, I understand that most of life is (to some degree) tedious, most of that which is not tedious is worse, very few moments remain which are unadulteratedly pleasant, and that most good things take a LOT of time and effort - and are never certain of coming to pass. That you can do EVERYTHING right and STILL LOSE. This may be a bleak outlook on life, and by modern standards might be considered "insane", but it is just the way it is. It is neither right nor wrong, it merely IS.

Bet you're an optimist...:-)

[Jorge]

Hearing that means a lot to me.

[Jorge]

Because you have free will - you cannot murder yourself. Murder indicates taking the life of someone else.

I call this a difference without a distinction.

If taking the life of a human is evil in God's eyes...the idea that it suddenly becomes OK when the person you murder is yourself...makes no sense at all.

And I still don't get where 'free will' makes it OK. Free will doesn't make any other evil OK in God's eyes. Why should killing yourself be any different?

[ValerieUSA]

I want any FReepers going through a loss of a spouse to feel free to contact me and just talk about it. I've been a widow for 5 and a half years and know it is really rough even beyond the first year. But the loss is manageable day to day and it is possible to enjoy life and to contribute something even when you feel so burdened.

You cannot have your old life together back again, but you can have a fresh start eventually, and see yourself and everything else in a whole different way - enjoying the discovery and growth of the new you. Thanking God that you still have the gift of life is not disrespectful or smug - it is faithfulness.

What a double tragedy for the world that Linda lost her husband and then her own life. Now her daughter has to grieve again.

Please, widows and widowers, talk to someone who has been there and is farther along on the journey to help you through the rough spots, and don't consider giving up and putting the people in your life through this agony.