Evidently you (like betty boop) are not using the word willful in that sense. I gather from your statement that you believe faith requires initiative and engagement (as in gears) - otherwise, one would be sitting there like a box of rocks or else just spinning their wheels.
OTOH, I use the term willfulness in the common usage - where unruliness would be the synonym and hence, obedience would be the antonym. That fundamental difference in word usage has caused much of our disagreement on this thread.
But laying the word usage aside, unspun, you and I have a further disagreement concerning how a born-again believer ought to deal with his self-will. To me it is a matter of theology (like a Peter v Paul dispute) and I dont have a problem with your view being different from mine. But evidently the difference troubles you. Perhaps you feel I am dangerously misguided?
As I mentioned in an earlier post, I am very Berean on spiritual matters. Ive read your post, listening for a confirmation in the Spirit and then studied Scriptures, both what youve cited and others known to me and to which I feel led in the Spirit:
Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the spirit which is of God; that we might know the things that are freely given to us of God. Which things also we speak, not in the words which man's wisdom teacheth, but which the Holy Ghost teacheth; comparing spiritual things with spiritual. But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know [them], because they are spiritually discerned. But he that is spiritual judgeth all things, yet he himself is judged of no man. For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ. I Cor 2:12-16
I read a different answer in the Scriptures (quoted below.) In my reading, the believer surrenders his self-will completely to Jesus and abides in Him and He, in return, abides in the believer and produces fruit of the Spirit, i.e. the believer is the vessel of His will and not self-will. I assert that spiritual fruits cannot be produced by mortal effort. There is no relationality or dancing, because the two are become one. The believer gives up his self-will; he retains his identity but never again exists apart from Jesus in any practical sense of the word exist.
Unspun offers this passage to show action verbs: I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, [which is] your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what [is] that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. Romans 12:1-2
The believer is told to be transformed by renewing his mind. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus commands us to be perfect --- which is a state of being and not an action:
He that rejecteth me, and receiveth not my words, hath one that judgeth him: the word that I have spoken, the same shall judge him in the last day. For I have not spoken of myself; but the Father which sent me, he gave me a commandment, what I should say, and what I should speak. And I know that his commandment is life everlasting: whatsoever I speak therefore, even as the Father said unto me, so I speak. John 12:48-50
To my spirit, the most important lesson of the passages unspun quoted is that Christ is the vessel of the Fathers will, not His own will. And, based on other Scriptures, that submission is what He wants of us as well:
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Galatians 5:22-25
The meek will he guide in judgment: and the meek will he teach his way. Psalm 25:9
For the LORD taketh pleasure in his people: he will beautify the meek with salvation. Psalm 149:4
Blessed [are] the meek: for they shall inherit the earth. Matthew 5:5
Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. Matthew 11:29
Tell ye the daughter of Sion, Behold, thy King cometh unto thee, meek, and sitting upon an ass, and a colt the foal of an ass. Matthew 21:5
But [let it be] the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, [even the ornament] of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. I Peter 3:4