[FirstTomato]

Yes, he was probably a victim, just as much a victim as the woman.

I think it is rare in any relationship like this where one person is the bad guy and the other is not. It takes two people to make this kind of horror.

People who have been in these situations as spouses think about this in one way, with blinders on.

But ask children who have lived under these conditions. There is always a dynamic that can't be explained in simplistic terms, and weapons (in the broadest sense) are used by both people. It is just that men often choose more lethal weapons, so automatically to much of society this makes them the bad guy. The truth is often quite different.

[firewalk]

Yes, he was probably a victim, just as much a victim as the woman.

No...he was not the "victim"...he pulled the trigger...

But ask children who have lived under these conditions. There is always a dynamic that can't be explained in simplistic terms, and weapons (in the broadest sense) are used by both people. It is just that men often choose more lethal weapons, so automatically to much of society this makes them the bad guy. The truth is often quite different.

Believe what you want...excuse away any crime you want...it is after all the victims fault. There are many men out there who own guns and no matter how much they want to...don't shoot the woman who pisses them off.

And I have lived under these "conditions" as you call them...

[Walnut]

I'm sorry but I disagree with you. Murders act alone to go the final step. what ever happened to walking away. ?If he met her in the parking lot with the gun on him ,it was premeditated. He had all intentions of killing her. first.

[FITZ]

There is always a dynamic that can't be explained in simplistic terms, and weapons (in the broadest sense) are used by both people.

I don't think he's a victim at all --not in any way but I agree there is usually a dynamic that isn't simple to explain. She was a victim ---but not one that got out immediately ---he was the persecuter and the flower-giver. What makes some women put up with abuse for years, anyone who works with these women victims will tell of how even when they are in domestic abuse centers, many leave and go back for more abuse. Maybe it's self-esteem? --they feel they deserve to be punished? Maybe the need to "have a husband" to provide a living? Or the social status of having a husband?

[HairOfTheDog]

Yes, he was probably a victim, just as much a victim as the woman.

Bizarro.