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To: TLBSHOW; Jeff Chandler; b4its2late; RLK; WKB; SpyGuy; timestax; friendly; SkyPilot; CathyRyan; ...
        From Clinton's upcoming memoirs:
 
It was hot in the Oval.   Summertime  DC.   You know, like when 
the crawdads clumb
onto the mangrove  roots just to keep from
being gumboed  alive.  

Or was that mandrake?  No, that was Lasater's deal. 

I was thinking about Gore and wishing he would give me a key 
to the thermostat covers when she walked in. 
 
"Mr. President, do you remember me?  Mrs. Edward Willey?" 

Remember her?  Legs going up like a Roman  candle; a rack to 
shame the 24-pointer I wasted  at Camp David, even 
if the SS had to tether it first.  Yeah, I  remembered the dame,
like Bennett remembers  San Francisco, Sacco remembers Vanzetti, 
like Hillary remembers...every gall-danged thing.  
Like how nervous Vince wa... 

"Mr. President?" 

"Huh?  Yes. Yes, Mrs.Willey. Sit down.  Sit down." 

Her dress was sultry and clingy, like a hot intern.  Her knees 
stayed tight until she was seated.  Then she crossed her legs in one 
practiced  motion,  her hose making a slithery sound. 

Out of all the broke down, multi-colored rug, sweaty hot Oval 
Offices in the world, she had to pick mine. 

I thumbed the intercom and told Betty to hold all calls.  
Then I asked Willey why she came. 

"My husband has embezzled a lot of  money that we have to pay back,
Mr.
President.  And I need something more than the volunteer job I 
have.  I mean, Easter Egg rolls...." 

I wanted to feel her pain, but she was across the desk.  How 
could I get into her...pantry.  That was it. The pantry. 

"Mrs. Willey, would you like a cup of coffee?" 

She couldn't turn it down.  I stood and gestured toward the 
galley just off the Oval and motioned for her to go in ahead 
of me.  It was like little animals when she walked. 

I asked her how many lumps she wanted, but I was thinking about 
how many lumps I was getting...one in the throat and one down at 
the Y. 

As much as I hate carpet burns, I suggested that we 
adjourn into the study.  Groans I make in the galley ricochet like 
singing in the shower, and I felt an aria coming on. 

The difference between the flourescent lights in 
the galley and the warm tungsten lamps n the study was startling.  
Her hair went from copper to a warm auburn and I went for 
a hug.  As I held her tense frame up close, her warmth began to 
spread to me,  rapidly getting hotter and wetter.  I backed up  
and took her squashed coffee cup from between us and sat it  
on the end  table. 

"Mr. President, aren't you afraid someone will walk in here?" 

"No, no," I told her how sorry I was for her troubles and pulled her 
against me again, my lips finding hers before  she turned her head 
sharply, leaving my tongue to dart into her earring. 

That was when I realized I was being set up.  Women could 
not resist me. Brother Graham told me so himself.I slid a finger 
into her breast pocket
looking for an West  Wing pass in case 
Hillary had sent her.  There was none.  I  would have to threaten 
her to buy her silence.  I took her hand and made sure she felt the 
hard barrel of my thigh-holstered snub nose.  It's a repeater. 

"It's not that I'm glad to see you.  It's just something I've  
wanted to do for a long time,"  I hissed. 

That did it.  She paled and backed away, "I have to be going.  It 
would kill my husbandif I did this." 

More than you ever knew, Sister.  More 
than you ever  knew. 

24 posted on 04/27/2003 12:46:31 PM PDT by gcruse
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To: gcruse
Also from Bubba's Memoirs:

"It was the best of thighs, it was the worst of thighs."

30 posted on 04/27/2003 12:57:15 PM PDT by Consort
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To: gcruse
gcruse. I bet you can hire on as a ghost writer. For a minute I thought WJBC wrote it "hisself".
40 posted on 04/27/2003 1:32:29 PM PDT by Lawgvr1955 (Never draw to an inside straight)
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To: gcruse
Sounds like a role for Leslie Niellson.
66 posted on 04/27/2003 2:31:17 PM PDT by sweetliberty ("Having the right to do a thing is not at all the same thing as being right in doing it.")
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To: gcruse
most enjoyable...
71 posted on 04/27/2003 2:39:06 PM PDT by krunkygirl
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To: gcruse
Like wow! (# 24.) Krintong's ghost writer a FReeper? Pigs fly!
122 posted on 04/27/2003 6:28:04 PM PDT by Revolting cat! (Subvert the conspiracy of inanimate objects!)
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