Anyone who has been harrassed by Telemarketers, read this!

[Angryreceptionist]

http://www.wtv-zone.com/redheaddad/tracer/tips.html

[EggsAckley]

Tips for Telemarketers

presented to delight the caller and enrage the public




Introduction

Managing Your "Do Not Call" List

Laughter And Stress Relief

How To Get Unlisted Numbers

Doing The Seinfeld Routine

Two Types of Referrals For Fun And Profit




First, if you work in a place where you cannot get away with the following, find another job. There are too many places begging for telemarketers, so you should expect a decent hourly wage plus a generous commission. Benefits are still sketchy in many areas, but look for improvements.

The Do Not Call List is a government-created entity and should be recognized as such. Naturally, for years telemarketers have removed names and numbers from prospect lists once they were identified as unlikely to become customers. The "Do Not Call" list is a bit different, as it has become the requirement to actually create a list of numbers that were once simply culled. In the computer age, this can still require paperwork for the TSR and extra steps on a daily basis for the IT worker, plus additional training for anyone in the industry. Realistically, the laws regarding this are nearly unenforcable, and their passing was simply a cheap political gambit. Look for more laws like this in the future.

The Do Not Call list will be impossible to maintain in a primitive phone room. Where even sophisticated contact management software will fail, how can handwritten lists be followed in a paper environment? As a TSR, be aware that only the exact wording by the prospect (which I will not give here) can invoke the required list, and a simple imperative "Take me off your list!" will not suffice. Additionally, it will be difficult for the customer to prove a subsequent call, and your company, not you, stands liable.

A simple remedy to avoid the dreaded invocation is to disconnect the call before the phrase is uttered. With practice, you can learn to hang up by the time you hear the (always somewhat louder and higher in pitch) "Put me...". You will have avoided unprofitable paperwork which is simply a waste of your time. You were hired to write leads or set appointments or make sales, you know, not to be a secretary. You will have saved your company expensive fines if that person is accidentally called again in the future. Don't worry about making a bad impression at this point; this jerk was just about to tell you to never call him again. And it was on your and your company's time and long distance bill, too. Why should you give the lazy bum the chance? It was an opportunistic shot on his part, since you had just happened to call him. If he is serious, that's fine, let him write a letter or make the call himself (in which case the paperwork would go to the front office). Like that would really happen!






Laughter is a wonderful stress relief. I mean, laughing on the phone when a prospect says something really stupid. You could say you are laughing with them but they just never got it. You just don't hear laughter in a phone room very often. So, the next time someone is rude or stupid, go ahead and laugh right at them on the phone. You might turn some heads in the office, but I have never heard of anyone getting in trouble this way. The worst thing that could happen is you get the prospect laughing too, and wind up making a sale.






Unlisted numbers are easy to get. Anytime you get really bored, try calling some to see how you like it. On the one hand, some of them might get really irate, since they pay more money to the phone company not to be in the phone book, but then, these folks don't get many telemarketing calls either, so it might balance out, depending on the area. Using a city or street directory, use the pages in the back where it lists the exchanges numerically (these pages are often green or a different color). Any gap in the sequence may contain unlisted numbers, and of course you will get a lot of disconnects.

No doubt, you will get sales. Don't forget to get the name and address.






On Seinfeld some time ago Jerry did a joke by asking a telemarketer for his home phone number. Not too many people emulated this until it got circulated by email. What the customer expects is for you to object or refuse. Have fun with this. Invariably respond, "Got a pencil?" You then have a couple choices. Perhaps most fitting would be to give the phone number of the last jerk who tried pulling this stupid, wornout joke on you. Once I read an old clod back his own phone number, and of course he didn't recognise it. I still smile at the thought of him trying to call himself at 2 AM and getting a busy signal.






Actually we will conclude with mention of THREE types of referrals. Anytime you have built rapport on the phone, you can ask for a referral. A key phrase I prefer is, "Maybe you can help me..." Don't forget to buddy up with a local hearing aid franchise, too. Anytime someone can't hear you on the phone, there's a good potential hearing aid candidate. A lead resulting in a sale should bring you $25 or more. You don't have to say anything to the deaf person about this, just make notes for the lead.

The third type of referral, of course, would be to this site. Sending me the numbers of rude customers will get them listed here.

Well, that's all for now, at least until I think of more. Send me your ideas, telemarketers.

Until next time, smile and dial!

[wcbtinman]

I have a new method that so far, has worked every time.

I just wait until I know it's telemarketer, and I interrupt them with 'I know where you live' in a low steady voice. Click.

[Poohbah]

I use this one on women: "So, what are you wearing?"

[babaloo999]

Or, if you have the time and the inclination to waste it, just keep them on the line as long as possible until they hang up on you. Waste a little of their long distance budget.

[Coto]

"Caller ID" is a WONDERFUL Thing !! !!

If a number shows up that I know, or even believe, is a "Telemarketer"....I simply hit the "Speakerphone" button twice.

Once answers the call -- -- the, quickly following, second one Hangs Up on 'em.....

[freedom4ever]

When you hear it's a telemarketer, just say hang on just a minute, lay down the phone and walk off for a while. Continue what you're doing for a bit and when you come back, they should be gone.

[PaulJ]

Or do what I do: Politely tell the telemarketer that you are not interested and hang up. Works every time. (They have to make a living too).

[craig_eddy]

Can't wait for this one: Do Not Call List.

[Mad Dawgg]

"I use this one on women: "So, what are you wearing?"

My favorite technique is to use the "Deliverence" type line:

"Is you got a purdy mouth?"

Male telemarkters seem to hang up faster than the female ones. :-D

[MeekMom]

I like this idea! I'm gonna do it at the next opportunity.

[YourAdHere]

I was a telemarketer myself many years ago when I was in college. I think now God is punishing me for that, cause they call me every freepin day.

I used to hear some pretty crazy stuff when I would call people. One woman told me that I had to call back later, cause she was busy pleasuring herself.

What would always make me feel low was when I'd ask for someone by name, and be told that that person had recently passed away. It was obviously upsetting to the people I was talking to, which is why I didn't last long in that job.

[IYAS9YAS]

Screw 'em. I have the right to not even hear from them to begin with. They don't pay my bill, they could be preventing a call I want or need to get through. Telemarketers should be buried up to their necks in a red ant hill and covered in honey. If I want someone's business, I will contact them.

[IYAS9YAS]

Thanks for the new idea...I'll tell 'em I'm dead from now on.

[Quilla]

For months we have received 3 or 4 unsolicited calls per evening. About 4 weeks ago, in my best b-otch voice, I explained to each caller that I was tired of these interruptions and to NOT CALL ME AGAIN. Haven't had a single call in the last two weeks.

[Aeronaut]

What would always make me feel low was when I'd ask for someone by name, and be told that that person had recently passed away.

Well passed around technique. Very unlikely that anyone actually was in that situation.

[judgeandjury]

When I'm on the phone with a telemarketer, if I want to have a little fun, I pretend that I'm hard of hearing and I ask the telemarketer to repeat everything three or four times. It doesn't take long for them to get frustrated and then hang up.

[LowOiL]

I don't have any problems, I just have a dial-up internet connection and seem to stay on line the whole time I'm home. Busy Busy Busy is all anyone hears. Now Spam, that is a different story...Uggg..

[asformeandformyhouse]

Or, if you have the time and the inclination to waste it, just keep them on the line as long as possible until they hang up on you. Waste a little of their long distance budget.

I hand the phone to my 8 year old son and tell him it's someone who wants to know everything he knows about 'Yu-Gi-Oh'.

[Doctor Stochastic]

I just give them my stock reply: "I do not accept any form of telephone solicitation." Then I hang up immediately. Now I only get a couple of calls each month.

I think they also have a device that figures out that I have an answering machine then they hang up. Anyone who wants to talk to me can leave a message; that's what the machine is for.